Graveyard Shift

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SpongeBob: (Runs inside panting) *Snaps fingers* Piece of cake.

Squidward: So you're not afraid?

SpongeBob: *walks past Squidward with pride* Pfff Nah.

Squidward: Well I am. Especially after *takes gulp* well.... You know.

SpongeBob: *Turns around and asks worriedly* What? What do I know?

Squidward: You don't remember?! It was all over the news!

SpongeBob: Tell me! Tell me!

Squidward: No, no, no, I probably shouldn't. It would ruin the night shift for you. *mischievous smile*

SpongeBob: *bounces up and down* What happened, what happened, what happened!

Squidward: You mean you've never heard the story of the... the Hash- Slinging Slasher?

SpongeBob: The slash- bringing hasher?

Squidward: The Hash- Slinging Slasher.

SpongeBob: The Sash-Ringing, the Trash-Singing, Mash-Flinging, The Flash-Springing, Ringing, The Cr-Crash-Dinging, daa.

Squidward: Yes. The Hash-Slinging Slasher. But, most people just call him The Ha *breaks into scream* because that's all they have time to say before he GETS THEM!

SpongeBob: *Begging* Tell me the story!

Squidward: Years ago at this very restaurant, the Hash-Slinging Slasher used to be a fry cook - just like you - only clumsier. And then, one night, when he was cutting the patties ...it happened.

SpongeBob: He forgot the secret sauce?

Squidward: No.

SpongeBob: He didn't wash his hands?

Squidward: No!

SpongeBob: Irregular portions?

Squidward: NO! He cut off his own hand by mistake.

SpongeBob: You mean like this? *Pulls one of his arms out of socket, another one grows back in its place* Or like this? Or this? *does it again* Or this? But what about this? Or this, or this, or this, or...

Squidward: *interrupts* Except he wasn't a sponge!

SpongeBob: *ask with all his extra hands creating a rainbow-like line* So?

Squidward: SO IT DIDN'T GROW BACK!!

SpongeBob: *Screams* OH, NO! *all his extra arms lift their hands upwards and run away*
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~Colette 🍭💛

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