Twenty-Nine // J.G.

twenty-seven.

Day 29.

     M A R L E Y     

Maybe I should have said something. Anything. Maybe then he wouldn't have left and I wouldn't be sitting alone in the middle of my bed, waiting until the silence engulfed my entire existence. I don't know what he was thinking, but if my own whirlwind of scenarios was any basis as to what he was going through, I didn't want to know.

"Take one more risk. Come on tour with me, Marley."

Silence.

Then a tsunami of thoughts drowned my mind all at once, so fast and so intense that I had to take a step back. Maybe that's where I went wrong.

I don't know what my face had looked like to him, but I saw the hope and adoration drain from his eyes like a plug had been pulled. Then he stepped back, too.

"Jack," My voice broke as I extended my hand out to touch him, but he just shook his head, dropping his gaze to the floor.

"No, I get it. Just..." He never finished that sentence. With a wave of his hand, he turned around and walked away, stomping on my heart with every step he took. In my head I tried to call out for him again, tried to will myself to chase after his heavy-hearted trail, yet my body didn't seem to understand the dire need to make things right. I was stuck in the moment, and all I had was the image of Jack's broken spirit replaying in my mind.

It's been over twelve hours since then, and I have yet to see him. I was going to go crazy if I couldn't talk to him soon. As terrifying as it was to possibly have him tell me that he didn't want to be together anymore, at least I would get closure and not spend the rest of my life wondering what he felt.

Upon hearing the hotel door open, I scrambled to my feet and scurried to my door, flinging it open.

"Jack?" I breathed out, only to have my spirits crushed once again when I saw Sam and Nate at the door.

"Nah, Mar, it's just your best friends that you've neglected." Nate joked, flashing a crooked grin, and although I knew he was only teasing, I immediately burst into tears.

Within a second, both of them were at my sides, their arms drowning me in a hug. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't control my emotions. In fact, it seemed that the more I tried to stop, the harder I cried. All day I had been too distracted by my thoughts and worries to cry, so now everything was flowing out like rivers. I didn't like to cry, nor was I comfortable with the fact that it was over a boy, but goddammit it was the boy I was in love with, no matter how hard I tried to pretend it wasn't true.

I don't remember how long we all stood there, but by the time I was calm enough to organize words into sentences, the food that the boys had brought was cold. We sat at the kitchen island, and they guiltily ate their dinner while I sulked and told them what had happened.

"Should I have said yes?" I questioned, despair filling up my voice like a hot air balloon.

"Did you wanna say yes? If you weren't sure, Mar, then it's not your fault. You don't have to do something you're not 100% into. That's not who you are." Sammy offered. It didn't exactly make me feel better, but he did have a point because when it came to decisions, I would never get close to choosing a side without thoroughly thinking about it.

"I don't know... I mean, tour is a lot." Meaning, a lot can happen.

"So is a long-distance relationship," Nate pointed out, "so it could be a good thing to go. Y'all can really test your relationship without no bet talk or shit like that. Do you wanna be with him, Mar?"

Even though every other question had a hazy answer, this was the clearest thing I knew. "I really do..." The words came out in a whisper, but suddenly my shoulders felt a hell of a lot lighter.

Apparently Sam and Nate realized the same thing because when I looked up, they were smiling at me.

"We want you to be happy, lil' sis. And even though I already saw it coming, y'all should be together."

"It's not just up to me though... I haven't seen him since last night, and he won't answer my texts or calls." The most frustrating part was that I had no clue what Jack was doing or feeling. Everything he told me and promised in the past thirty days was probably already down the toilet, but part of me clung onto the hope that maybe he just needs time to himself and when he gets back everything will be fine.

It wasn't long before Sammy and Nate decided to go out again after making sure I would be okay, which once again left me alone to battle the oncoming flood of thoughts. The isolation that surrounded me did no good either, so I plugged my earphones in and turned the volume up before sitting at the desk by the window. I had to get my thoughts out somehow, and since talking didn't seem to be on my side, I began to write.

I wrote until the sun went down and the city lights reflected on the ocean. Until my hand cramped so badly I had to shake it out for two minutes. Until I almost felt the need to vomit because so many words had traveled from my brain onto the paper.

Then finally, I held up one perfectly written, perfectly composed, perfectly Marley letter filled with thoughts I would never dare to attempt to say in person. A sense of calmness filled my lungs as a breath of relief drew from my lips, and for the first time since our date last night, I smiled. If Jack and I's run was over, at least I could be satisfied about the fact that I got my feelings out in a healthy way.

The chair screeched underneath my weight as I pushed back, and I finally went to turn down the music that I had forgotten was playing the whole time. Speaking of, I realized time had slipped right past me, and it was nearing midnight. I doubted Sam and Nate would be back before the sun rose, but I stepped into the main suite anyway to quench my overdue thirst. I laid the letter on the counter top before padding to the mini fridge and grabbing myself a bottle of water. One foot crossed over the other while I rested the small of my back against the counter, my gaze out of focus as I stared at nothing in particular.

The suite was just as quiet as it was for most of the day, but when I trained my ears on the little things, I picked up on some sort of resonance. I stood up straight, fear striking my first instincts, before I looked over the counter with better observance.

A room card and keys to the rental car. Jack's room card.

"Jack?" I practically choked on the water, slamming the bottle onto the counter before scrambling to reach my letter. The music and thoughts within my room must have been so loud that I missed his arrival. Nonetheless, now was the time to set things straight. This would be the biggest move of my entire life, and despite everything that I stood for and the hell I've been through in the past twenty-four hours, I was ready. However, that fact wasn't stopping the harsh beat of my heart as I scanned over the handwritten words in front of me. "Jack," I repeated more confidently this time. "Jack!" His name left my lips along with a breath of air, liberating me from the burdens that buried me these past few days. I scurried down the dark hallway that seemed to go on forever, then all of a sudden I was stood in front of his door. Behind it held everything I wanted in life, and within seconds, my words could make or break the promise of a fulfilling future. "Jack, I have something to–" The words fell short when I heard a breathless harmony behind the wooden barrier of his room. Few, dreadful, possibilities entered my thoughts as to what those sounds could be, yet still I found myself twisting the cold metal doorknob to reveal the truth.

Upon entering, I stood for a moment in shock, my brain unable to process the event quickly enough for me to turn away. Instead, I took a double glance in pure refusal to believe the sight before me, though I thoroughly regretted it when I made out a small, petite figure tucked beneath his broad one. I watched him move for a split second before my eyes darted towards the clock. When I realized the time had read 11:59 P.M., only one thought sparked my mind. He had lost the bet, and I had lost all feelings that I had racked up in the thirty day period we shared together. Correction – the twenty-nine days we shared together because that neanderthal of a man couldn't even bear with me for thirty.

So if he couldn't, who could? No man, I presumed.