When We Grow Up

Chapter 2

Louise pushes one last item into her suitcase, praying that it's small enough that she doesn't have to check her bag. It probably isn't She has to sit on the top to zip it closed, after all.
Her flight's leaving in two and a half hours, and she's seriously regretting booking one so early. The 7:15 AM Flight was so much more expensive, though. Maybe flying in the middle of the night could become something she grows to love.
A few yawns later she changes her mind.
Her father was seriously pushing her buttons this week, first waking her up so early with that stupid call and now this ridiculously early flight. How was the pilot even going to stay awake? Oh God, she thinks.
As she starts to head out the door she notices something hanging above her couch, and smiles.
The ever-familiar rabbit eared hat.
She had almost debated wearing it to the airport this morning just to get a laugh out of her family.
What the heck, she thinks, and took the soft pink fabric from its plaque.
She wonders if it still fits.
The second she puts the ears on she remembers why exactly she'd loved this hat so much. God, it was so soft. No wonder she'd taken naps under the bleachers in P.E.
...And math.
...And sometimes science.
Okay, always in science. She always seemed to get put in a class with the most boring teachers imaginable.
She drags her heavy suitcase out the door, down several flights of steps, and into the car.
Louise still hates apartment buildings.
It's long before she's stuck in traffic, yelling at the idiot in front of her and using less-than-nice words to describe his driving skills (or lack thereof).
As she walks in the airport, she feels her phone buzz in her pocket.
Seriously, now?
She sighs, picking up the phone and answering the call.
"Gene, why?" She asks.
"Are you at the airport?" Gene asks. Louise rolls her eyes, some guy accidentally running over her foot with his suitcase. She curses at him under her breath.
"Yeah." She says. "Is that why you decided to call?"
"I dunno." Gene says. "Do you know how to tie a tie?"
Louise sighs. "Gene, I can't exactly walk you through that right now."
"I had time for you and your high-heel problems!" Gene complains. "Come on, help me."
"I'm busy." Louise says. "I'll be there in a few hours. Can it wait?"
"It can wait about two minutes." Gene replies. Louise smacks her hand to her forehead.
"Gene, call Tina. I can't deal with this in the security line."
"I called Tina and she told me to call you." Gene says.
"Can't you ask Courtney?" Louise asks, and the security guard glares at her.
"No phones." He says, and Louise holds up her hand.
"She doesn't know how." Gene complains. The security guard keeps glaring at Louise.
"Bunny girl, no phones."
"Shut your face, give me a minute." Louise replies. "Gene, I taught Raquel. Ask her."
"I did! She wants ten dollars!"
Louise smiles. She's proud of teaching her siblings' children about extortion.
"Gene, just give her the ten dollars. I have to go before this security guard kills me." Louise says, and the security guard's glare becomes even more menacing. Louise didn't know that was possible.
"Wait, are you going to be at the airport at noon?" Gene asks. Louise shrugs.
"11:30-ish, I guess. Wait, are you picking me up from the airport?"
"Dad can't do it so he called me." Gene says.
"Okay, Gene, this guy is literally going to murder me in the next two minutes if I don't get off the phone. Don't you dare be late to the airport. I have to go." Louise says, and shot the security guard an even more menacing glare.
"Wait-" Gene says, and Louise hangs up the phone.
"Put the phone away." The security guard says, and Louise rolls her eyes.
"Whatever you say." She replies in a sickeningly sweet tone.
"Are you mocking me?" The man asks, and Louise shrugs.
"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. It's your call."
"I think you are." He says, and Louise lifts her bag onto the security table.
"Well, good for you." She says, patting his arm. "Now I'd like to go visit my family."
He sighs. "Walk through the little gate."
Louise does as she's told and then hears the godforsaken alarm.
Oh, for the love of God, now this idiot has to check her for weapons? She thought she was done with him.
"Ma'am, please remove the hat." The security guard says. Louise looks at his name tag. Hank. She hated Hank.
"Y'know, Hank, I think we both know I'm not hiding any illegal substances or weapons in my hat." Louise says, and Hank raises an eyebrow.
"You saying that makes me suspect you even more. Now take off the hat."
Louise sees her bag come out of the security scan, and pulled her wallet from the front pocket. "What's it gonna take for you to let me go, Hank? Ten bucks? Twenty?" She says, and Hank took the wallet and put it back in her bag.
"Are you bribing an officer?" He asks.
Louise shrugged. "Are you an officer?" She retorts.
"All right, this was fun. Take off the hat, sweetheart, or I'm reporting you to the authorities."
Not again, she thinks.
"Can't you just check it on my head?" She asks. Hank shakes his head.
"If you keep it up I'm going to have to confiscate this as evidence." He says, grabbing the ears and pulling them from her head.
Oh God, she hated this feeling when she was a kid, but now it's even worse.
"Give it back!" She says, and Hank holds them above her head.
"What are you hiding in here?" He asks, shaking the hat. Louise sees a little bulge under one of the ear flaps and suddenly she remembers  just exactly what she'd hidden in there. Oh crap.
Hank doesn't seem to notice the bulge.
"Look, Hank, I know you don't like me, and I'm not your biggest fan either. What do you say you just let me go on my merry way and nobody gets hurt." Louise says.
"Is that a threat?" He asks, and stifles a laugh. Louise's eye twitches. Just because she's small doesn't mean she can't seriously mess someone up.
"Only if you don't give back my ears." She replies.
"No offense, but you don't scare me." Hank says.
"Not yet." Louise mutters. "Look, Hank, I don't want to hurt you."
Hank bursts out laughing. "Oh yeah? What would you do?" He says. "Step on my foot?"
Louise's eye twitches again. "Look, honey, I'm a lawyer, and I take care of the murder cases. So why don't you just let me go, and then nobody gets hurt."
"Okay, lady, I'm going to report you." Hank says, and as he pulls out his phone Louise tugs on the collar of his shirt, pulling him down to her eye level.
"I know some people, Hank. I can make this all look like an accident." Louise smirks. "And I'm no stranger to lying in front of a judge."
Hank sighs. "Look, I don't see anything in the hat." He says.
"Of course you don't." Louise replies. "Because there's nothing in the hat, Hank."
Hank sighs. "You're free to go." He says. She grabs the hat from his hands and puts it on her head.
Louise stomps on his foot - hard - for good measure, digging the heel of her shoe in. She hopes it hurts.
She grabs her suitcase and her jacket and sets on her way to the gate.