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Random modern!AU headcanons;;

- john has neko atsume in his phone and his home there is literally cat heaven

- dork art student ringo sketches john sometimes on the back of his notebooks

- ringo wears mismatched socks (either on purpose or bc he's too lazy to find the pair john still doesn't know)

- john tends to ruin ringo's childhood a lot

"ringo,, psst,, the priest in the little mermaid has a boner"

"john i swear to god i will-"

"did you know that male clownfishes turn into females when their mate dies and then they reproduce with their male offspri-"

"tOO FaR"

- ringo purposely sings john's favorite songs offkey and he usually does it at the shower so he wouldn't be able to stop him

- ringo has this pastel pink polaroid camera (you know what specific camera i mean) and john thinks its a hassle to keep on buying films for it

- john's voicemail tone is literally the two of them giggling and snorting "we're *giggle* busy right now so- *laughs* john stop it! It tickles!"

- ringo's laughs ranges from soft, girly giggles to thin, nervous chuckles to the laugh of the oldest princess from mulan 2

- "oh my god this is so sad!" "ringo,, this is the hundreth time you've watched bambi" "it's still sad!!"

- whenever john speaks in german ringo just dies a little and tries not to make a single sound

- they did the holding-hand picture trend thingy for jokes and everyone freaked the hell out and thought they honestly were a couple then

- ringo fails at baking and fails even more when john comes along because they end up throwing flour at each other honestly who has time to clean that shit up

- ringo's bad at sewing and one time he made this "i <3 you — from ringo " pillow for john and he still hugs it at night even if the heart looks like an upside down triangle

- ringo can make 298394050 excuses just to cuddle with john

- john complains about ringo's obsession with cartoons but he watches anime on a daily basis (blame yoko)

- ringo gets shitfaced at a party easily and john has to carry him home

- john didn't cut his hair and shave for a week and ringo attacked him with a frying pan thinking he was a "burglar"

- john sleeps so deeply that ringo has to manually wake him up every morning

- Which is basically like this:

"AAAAA ZA PENYAAAA-"

"five more minutes ringo"

- john is immune to it okay

-

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