"So, why are you here, Camila?" The woman prodded curiously, studying my features carefully.
Honestly, I didn't know how to answer her. Having spoken to Lauren and Normani recently, they brought up the fact that I've never been physically intimate with anyone. For a reason unbenounced to me, they believe that my lifestyle is strange and unnatural. I had to disagree. To me, sexuality is completely unnecessary.
The ability to share someone's mind and emotions is far more intriguing to me than having to result to physical intimacy. I truthfully don't see the appeal of it. From what I've learned, sex is an insurmountable list of terrible outcomes. What I do know is that sharing in deep conversation with someone cannot lead to me being physically hurt, it cannot lead to an unwanted pregnancy, and it cannot lead to any unsightly diseases. So why am I here?
"I... I don't know, exactly," I stutter, still unsure of why I'd decided to go along with this.
She gave me a curious expression and crossed her arms over her chest thoughtfully. "Are you sexually active?" She asked bluntly.
The question didn't make me uncomfortable, as many had asked before, mostly men. I'd learned to be confident in my answer and not allow any further questioning on the matter, as it really wasn't of any importance.
"No," I responded simply.
She nodded her head in understanding before lifting her right leg over her left and resting her hands gently on her knee. "And why is that, if I may ask?"
"I just... I don't feel the need to be," I uttered, staring down at my hands nervously. In this woman's presence, I was becoming increasingly more uneasy. Her tone with each question was kind, but I noticed that she was staring at me with such intensity that I began to feel my pulse quicken. She stared with these passionate brown eyes in a way that made me feel like she was trying to see past my exterior. She was looking for something more than the simple response I was offering, not once did she avert her gaze.
"Stop me if this is a touchy subject..." She posed, her eyes heavy with anticipation as she continued. "But, is there any underlying reason as to why you feel this way?"
"You mean... Have I ever been raped, or..." She nodded hesitantly, awaiting my answer. "No," I tell her, noticing her shoulders relax at the admittance. "No, nothing like that. I just... I don't see the appeal, I guess."
I watched as her lips curved up into a smile. She really did have a beautiful smile. She was a beautiful girl. I could tell just by looking at her that she must have had many stories to tell about her sexual escapades. This is not to say that she came off as 'slutty', just that and carried herself in a manner of a very experienced woman.
"That's wonderful to hear, Camila," She told me, smiling brightly. "Do you mind if I ask you a few more questions? Some a bit more... personal."
I shook my head in the negative and met her gaze. "Go ahead," I said, waving my hand dismissively.
She adjusted her position on the black leather chair so that she was resting her elbow on the arm of it, her legs still crossed. "Do you pleasure yourself?" I tilted my head to the side, trying to understand what exactly she was asking me. "Uhm, yes. In many ways, actually." I told her. At this admittance, her smile widened.
"Great," She began. "What do you use?" She asked curiously, her eyes really boring into mine this time.
"To pleasure myself?" I confirm. She nods slightly, eagerly awaiting my response. "I don't know..." I began. "Books, walks around my neighborhood, conversation-" I planned to continue until I halted by the sound of her throaty laughter. "No, Camila... What do you use to sexually pleasure yourself?"
