You know how spiders have that annoying habit of hiding in the places you least expect to find them? Yeah. That happens to me way too often.
“Laurence, go get us some beers please” said Kier, peering at me through his fringe.
I sighed, “What did your last slave die of?”
“Nothing, he’s still alive” he responded with a smirk.
I turned to face Drew, who was sitting cross legged on the floor playing with his bass. “What are you laughing at, short arse?”
Drew instantly stopped laughing. He was kinda sensitive about his height.
“Don’t be so harsh to him, Laur” said Luke disapprovingly.
I walked past Drew and ruffled his hair, “Sorry mate. You know I only mean it” I said with a grin.
“Don’t worry about him Drew, you’re pocket sized, it’s cool” commented Kier.
“Its okay wooly, you’ll grow one day” added Shane quietly.
“Yeah, can’t you get injections in your butt that make you grow quicker?” chimed in Luke.
I burst out laughing and escaped out the door before Drew could find something to throw at me for starting the banter. I could still hear Shane, Kier and Luke laughing as I entered the kitchen and opened the fridge. I grabbed a pack of beers and placed them on the side so I could get some glasses from the cupboard.
When I opened the cupboard I got the shock of my life. I screamed and ran back into the living room, pale faced and shaking.
Luke jumped up and placed a hand on my arm, “You okay Bevers?”
“What’s the matter, dude?” asked Kier.
“Why did you scream?”
“Spider” I muttered weakly.
They stared at me in stunned silence.
“Laurence, you do realise you’re a 24 year old man, not a 5 year old girl, right?”asked Drew, faking mock concern.
“Dude! You didn’t see it! It’s like the size of bloody Aragog!” I insisted.
“Did it ask if you were a friend of Hagrid’s?” asked Shane, quietly.
I thought Kier was going to die, he was doubled over with hysterical laughter, and so was Drew. Shane was chuckling, pleased with his joke and Luke was obviously struggling not to laugh. Shane doesn’t talk too much, but when he does, he comes out with some killer one-liners. But they’re funnier when they aren’t based off of my fear.
“Guys! Seriously! It’s massive!”
“I’ve gotta see this monster of a spider” said Luke, heading towards the kitchen.
I followed behind him but stayed by the door, far away from the cupboard.
Kier came up behind me, followed closely by a curious pair of timids.
“Fucking hell!” Luke cried.
The timids and Kier jumped back in surprise, whilst I stood staring at him triumphantly, “I told you it was fucking huge”
