South Park One Shots

Call of the Siren (Kenny x reader)

     You snickered quietly in the alleyway as you finished your graffiti. Stepping back, you admired the artwork you had put on the side of the building. It was a crudely drawn image of Eric Cartman's fat head. Beside it, you had written, "I'm ugly and I'm proud!". You tucked the can back into your messenger bag, before taking your track-phone out and taking a picture of the masterpiece. "That's what he gets for being an asshole to Butters." You mumbled, smirking as you made sure to send the image into a mass group message. Inside the group messaged contained all the heroes in South Park that you knew of: The Freedom Pals. The two rivaling hero groups had joined forces not too long ago, meaning when one had a problem they all did too. How would this image be a problem to the heroes, one might wonder? Simple, because The Coon was the muse on display: Eric Cartman.

You giggled as you watch The Coon's text messages fly across the screen, insulting and declaring you his "nemesis". You sighed, content with the ruckus you caused. You neatly tucked the track-phone back into your bag and turned around to leave the alleyway. Right as you did, however, you heard the sound of a trashcan lid being knocked over behind you. You swiveled around, only to come face to face with your favorite hero. "Hey cutie." You cooed, raising your voice an octave. You did so easily since your voice was your "source" of powers after all. Plus, this hid your identity a bit better than the rest of the heroes.

Mysterion's glare hardened on your form. "You're coming with me, Siren." He ordered, getting into fighting position. You 'tsked' and rolled your eyes. He always thought he was the one in control, didn't he? 'How cute.' You thought, tugging your hood a little further down. Although you had a mouth mask covering the portion of your face below your eyes, you still didn't want him to get a good look at what he could see.

"As cute as it is that you think you can control me, baby, I've done nothing wrong. I'm just using my freedom of speech against that bully." You pointed to your piece behind him. He didn't turn away and instead stepped closer to you. "I know that I'm cute and you're into me, but you have got to stop stalking me, love. How distasteful, you little pervert!" You feigned disappointment and crossed your arms. "If you want to be my hero baby, all you had to do was ask." You winked, delighted by the red that spread across his cheeks. You meant most of the flirtatious things you said to him, after all. You couldn't help finding yourself attracted to him.

"Stop playing games. You're a criminal, a villain, and I will punish you." Mysterion cracked his knuckles, trying to intimidate you.

"Oh, you're going to punish me? Kinky." You stroked his cheek, only for him to smack away your hand. As much as you enjoyed teasing and messing with him, this hero talk got annoying. "Look sugar, this good guy vs. bad guy shit is getting old. No one's 100% good or bad all of the time. If anything, I'm an anti-hero, not a villain baby. So are you." You informed, strutting away. "Sweetie, you call yourself a hero, but you determine that I'm a guilty criminal without any proof. What happened to 'innocent until proven guilty'? If anyone is a hero here, it's me." You rewarded yourself, laughing as you noticed his form tense up. Clearly your "friendly" banter wasn't appreciated, as per usual.

"You're no hero, or anti-hero. You're a villain, and that's all you'll ever be. Believe it or not, but spray painting walls, tp-ing and egging houses are illegal. You're being a pest, and it's time someone exterminates you." He dashed forward to grab you, only to be frozen in place.

"Freeze!" You sing out a short note, causing him to freeze in his position. You quickly turn around, and get ready to run, knowing your command won't last but a minute or two. "And by the way, I'm not going to say this again: my name isn't Siren, it's Harmony! Get it right, My Stereo." You teased, purposely saying his name wrong. And with that, you were off running down the sidewalk. Not long after you took off, you could hear footsteps following behind you moving rapidly. You turned your body around, still running, and pointed at his form. "Stuck like glue!" You belted, watching as his feet became unable to move again, almost as though he was stuck in something.