Hudson's Heart

Hudson's Heart Chapter Fifteen

Waking up with Dade's arm flung across my chest and his right leg over my hip, feels so familiar to me now. Even though we haven't had sex, we are just as intimate as any couple that does. The intimacy we share is strong and true, even though we still haven't crossed that line. Sex doesn't define what Dade and I have. What we have is something worth so much more than just that. Our connection is so deep and honestly raw, it doesn't need to be cemented by the final act of sex. I can leave this place tomorrow, knowing that I have been touched by a faultless man who respected me enough to not fuck me.

There is that damn word again, leave. How I hate that fucking word. I stretch out trying to shake off the nauseous dread that has also woken up with me. My heart beats sluggishly within my weighted chest, while my mind wishes it could avoid what is to come.

Our last day together has indeed arrived. My emotions are all over the place. Inside, I am trying to hold it altogether. I cannot allow myself to fall apart on our last day. Dade has special plans for us. I have to keep a tight lid on things. I simply have to suppress everything I feel. Not only for my sake but for Dade's as well.

This past week really has been wonderful. I literally have had the best time of my entire life. Sharing it all with the most special and enigmatic person I have ever met; who just so happens to be sweetly lying across me now. I lie here, just soaking up this moment. My mind is storing every single curve and contour of Dade's beautiful face. I place it somewhere I shall never forget . . . forever a beautiful memory.

When I feel a choking lump forming low in my throat. I know I must do something before all hell breaks loose within me. I slide across the bed, trying to quietly slip into the bathroom.

"Are you okay?" Dade groggily asks.

I look across at his gorgeous sleepy face. "Yes . . . I'm fine," I quickly respond, pulling my dressing gown up over my shoulders.

He turns onto his side, placing his hands underneath the pillow that he's cuddling. "Don't lie to me, Georgie."

My downward gaze doesn't hide my hurt while I'm tying up my dressing gown. "I'm sorry. I can't help but feel sad today," I explain in a weak voice, forcing myself to look across at him.

Dade gives me a long pained look in return. "I know. I feel the same, but we have to make the most of today."

I force a smile. "I know," replying more cheerfully.

Dade stares at me with a mixture of sympathy and affection. How can I feel so sad when I have those soulful eyes looking back at me in that way? I give myself a good internal dressing down. No feeling sorry for yourself today, Georgina Harris! Go and have some bloody fun!

I lightly pad across the cabin floor, sitting beside Dade on the bed. "Anyway, I can't be a miserable cow. I have your surprise to look forward to, don't I?" I kiss his naked shoulder, breathing him in.

Dade grins. "Yes, you do."

I run my fingers through his tousled light brown hair, bending down to kiss his parted mouth. "I'm going to make a start on my packing, then I'm all yours."

He kisses me hard, tugging gently on my bottom lip as our mouths part. "Lucky me," he says in a raspy, just woken up voice, with a glorious lop-sided grin.

I open the wardrobe door, lifting out my suitcase. "What are we doing this morning?" I ask, needing to occupy my thoughts whilst I'm in the act of my dreaded packing.

Dade sits up, rubbing his still sleepy eyes. "I'm taking some new guests on a ride this morning, so you can either come or finish your packing."

I know I should be packing but I want to enjoy my last ride with Dade. "I think I will do a little bit now. Then I will join you for a ride. I can get some more done before we go out later," I tell him, hastily throwing clothes and shoes into my suitcase.