The Peacekeeper

Chapter 11

Karkat was just numbly staring at the wall, not talking. Dave was worried, now he really didn't know what to do. He didn't want to leave Karkat alone anymore. What if he freaks out and thinks he sees blood and thinks he killed someone again? What if next time it's worse? Fuck, Dave didn't know what to do.

"Do you want to talk about it?" The albino asked timidly, but Karkat merely shook his head. "Okay...but uh, just let me know alright? I'm here for you dude." Karkat nodded numbly and Dave stood up, walking out of his room to give Karkat some space. He wanted to do something, but he didn't know what. He pondered the idea of calling Sollux and Equius over, but he had a feeling that that might make things worse. Kanaya? No...someone different so Karkat would be able to relax and slowly reconnect with his friends. But who...?

~

"Hey John." Dave whispered as John walked in. "Keep quiet, I don't want Karkat freaking out or anything alright?"

"No problem!" John whispered back. "So, what exactly is it you needed me to do?"

"I don't fucking know man, just...talk to him. Be friends with him. Use your goofball charm. I just...I want him to feel safe and calm and shit. I told you what happened earlier right?" John shook his head. "Well I found him in the corner, curled up into a little ball and crying that there was blood everywhere and he just killed someone." John frowned and tried to peek inside of Dave's room.

"Why do you think I'll be able to help? He's always sort of hated me. Or at least I annoyed him to some extent. What if I just set him off again?" Dave shook his head.

"You won't. At least I think you won't. If he starts to get crazy just try to get out. Don't hurt him or freak out or anything. I'll freeze him and you get to go home. Deal?" The buck-toothed boy nodded hesitantly and together they slowly walked to Dave's room and peeked in.

"Hey buddy..." The albino said, getting Karkat's attention. "You remember John right? He came to visit you. Isn't that cool?" Karkat didn't respond and Dave lightly pushed John in. John had to admit, he was a bit nervous.

"Hey Karkat! Long time no see huh dude?" Karkat stared up at John blankly before scooting slightly, giving him room to actually sit down. "So uh, how you been? You look better than when I first saw you!" Karkat shrugged. This was going well. Dave kept mentally reassuring himself that this was going to be fine. He just needed to leave them alone, so he went into the kitchen, fixing them all up something to eat. It was about time Karkat had a snack anyway.

"So," John continued, "did you know that Dave's going to technically be my son soon? Roxy and I are engaged so my best friend is going to have to call me 'dad' or some shit! Weird huh?" Another shrug. "Oh, fuck, that's right. You're a troll, you don't...have families like humans. Well you see--"

"A dad is male figure in someone's life who raises them or helps create them. I know what a father is John. I technically am one after all." John blinked, not really sure how to respond to that.

"Oh...okay...I didn't know you had...kids..."

"I don't, not anymore at least. They aren't genetically mine but...I adopted them. A while ago. They're mine now so I'm their father. Or...I was their father." John felt the awkwardness begin to seep into the air between them. He really didn't know how to respond to that now. Instead of continuing this conversation that was doomed for disaster, he cleared his throat and changed the topic.

"So uh, Dave was thinking about becoming a director! Like Dirk's bro! Since his DJ job doesn't really pay him regularly...plus he's been uh, spending a lot more money recently...so he needs the cash..." Karkat grunted in response. "He was thinking of re-making one of my old favorite movies! Isn't that cool?" The troll shrugged and John frowned. "Maybe he could do one of your rom-coms too? That'd be cool wouldn't it!"

"Those movies were horribly written and unrealistic as fuck. I honestly don't see the point in them anymore. In anything really." Oh fuck, the awkwardness was coming back again.

"But...you loved those movies and those books! You used to read them to Dave. You even wrote some of your own..."

"People change John. Two sweeps of fucking shitstorm after shitstorm can do a lot to a person." Karkat's hands were balled up into fists and John was honestly scared, or at least worried. Thankfully Dave came in a moment later with some snacks.

"How's it going in here?" John shook his head, indicating that things were not going as well as Dave hoped and Dave frowned. "Well...I have snacks. Karkat, your gummy vitamins..." Karkat turned to Dave and grabbed the two little bear shaped gummy vitamins and ate them before grabbing his glass of orange juice. Meanwhile John and Dave shared a bowl of potato chips. They'd offer Karkat some but his stomach just wasn't ready for it yet.

"So...what're we talking about here? John? Karkat? Care to fill me in?"

"Nothing." The troll replied curtly. If Dave wanted Karkat to get back on track to the happy train he'd need to do something.

"Well...lets talk about something then. How about...the other day when Karkat got a full nights sleep. No waking up in the middle of the night whatsoever. Just full on sleep. Ain't that a big step forward John?" John smiled widely and nodded.

Karka hated this. Everyone talked about him and to him like he was a child. He wasn't he was traumatized. He didn't need to be talked down to. He needed to comforted. This was absolute bullshit and Karkat wanted to let them both know. But fuck, Dave was trying so hard. He didn't want to let him think that everything he was doing was only making him worse. In all honesty Karkat was feeling better. He was beginning to eat and sleep, this was actual progress. He just wish didn't treat him like he was stupid instead of just traumatized.

~

Later once John left, Karkat was sitting patiently on the couch, waiting for Dave to do his regular debriefing about Karkat's day. The albino sat down as expected and Karat immediately began speaking.

"I want you to stop it." Dave blinked, surprised.

"Stop? Stop what?"

"Stop all that shit you're doing." The troll replied curtly. He didn't even bother to glance over. "You're treating me like I'm stupid instead of just...in pain. And I'm not fucking stupid. I'm not some little wriggler that you have to use baby talk to communicate with, I don't need you to constantly hold my hand Dave." Dave was at a loss for words, he didn't know what to do or say.

"I'm just trying to help you dude--"

"Yes and I appreciate that but...that isn't the way to help. You of all people must know. I don't want a fucking pity party thrown for me. I don't people coming in and out thinking 'Oh look at poor Karkat, it must suck to be him.' I don't want that. I want to feel normal again. I want you to help me but I don't want to be treated like a goddamn infant with some sort of sickness."

"Karkat, I didn't know, I thought I was helping." Karkat stood up, still not at looking. Dave stood up as well. "Listen dude, I swear I'll stop. I didn't know it bothered you, I swear I'll stop."

"Good. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to try to get some sleep..." With that, Karkat left Dave alone in the living to bear his guilt by himself.