I never knew I needed you

Chapter 11

Five twenty-eight...

Five twenty-nine...

Five thirty...

One hour left, I thought to myself, feeling my pulse quicken. One hour left until my world stopped.

I sat alone in the waiting area of the eerily quiet hospital, watching the seconds tick by on the clock hanging on the wall.
They say that if you watch a clock time moves slower.
They had no idea what they were taking about. In fact, for the entire time I've been sitting here(which had been quite some time mind you)time seemed to be moving faster. Faster. Faster.
Not enough time, a nagging voice in the back of my head reminded me. Not enough time for me, not enough time for Derek.

My fists clenched as I pushed the unwanted thought from my mind. It seemed only minutes ago I was helping evacuate the hospital, rolling wheelchairs and stretchers down ramps while the elderly in them bitched about the "bumps" in the pavement. A couple patients even yelled at me when I didn't respond to their complaints.
But, I didn't care about there minor discomforts. All I had wanted to do in that instance was yell right back at them,'He's going to die. He's going to leave me. Don't you understand that?'
But I didn't, I couldn't bring myself to say those words, so I held back tears and apologized.

What I would do to turn back time. But, I couldn't, I could only sit and wait.
Wait for the Alphas to arrive.
Wait for the line of mountain ash to lock them in.
Wait for the air vents to turn on.
Wait as the wolfsbane took effect and killed them.
All of them

"Stiles..."
A calm, female voice startled me out of my thoughts. I turned and saw Lydia, looking at me with pity. Like she knew nothing she could say would change anything, and knew better then to try. She looked at me in a way that said, if the worst happened, when the worst happened, the pack would be there to try and piece me back together.

And in a way, I hated that look. They all looked at me like Derek was already dead.

"It's time," she whispered. But, no matter how quiet she was, her words bounced off the walls and ricocheted in my brain, making me want to scream.

Yet, I managed to force myself out of the chair, feeling my mouth go dry, like all the moisture had been soaked into my eyes.
Lydia outstretched her hand, and I took hold of it, knowing if she wasn't there to support me I would collapse.

I looked back at the clock.

Six thirty.
~~~~~~~~~~

My feet felt like lead as I walked with Lydia to our hideout, an abandoned building directly across from the hospital. (It was far enough away that the Alphas wouldn't notice us, but close enough that if something went wrong we would be able to help)
My breath was coming too quickly, and I was a shaky, clammy mess.

If Lydia noticed, she was nice enough not to say anything.

I didn't know what to do, I couldn't let Derek go in that building, I couldn't sit by idly and watch as he died. But, there was nothing I could do stop it.

We stepped into the rusty old building, where the rest of the pack was sitting in silence.
Isaac, Erica, and Boyd (an: for the sake of the story their alive) all looked up as we entered. Scott and Allison were gone, meaning the plan was already in motion.
I looked around again, and felt a lump rise in my throat.
"Where is he?" I asked. They knew who I was talking about.
No one answered.
The four of them looked around nervously, trying to avoid my eye. I felt fear grip my heart.
"Where is he?" I asked again, clenching my fist.
Lydia placed her hand on my shoulder,"Maybe you shouldn't see him Stiles. Wait till it's all o-"
I looked at her with murder in my eyes,"Where is he!" I demanded, cutting her off.

"I'm right here, assuming you were talking about me." I whipped my head to the side, feeling relief wash over me as Derek stepped out of the bathroom. He stood there with a small smile on his face, wiping his wet hands on his pants without a care in the world. And all of a sudden I felt rage boil in me until I thought I was going to pop.

"Your unbelievable you know that? And not in a good way."
The smile dropped from his face, realizing I wasn't in the mood for jokes.
"Maybe you should step outside," Derek said looking at the pack. They nodded and filed out the door quickly.

As soon as the door closed I let all the words I had been holding in pour out of my mouth.
"How dare you stand there and make jokes Derek Hale. Your about to kill yourself, and you act like nothing's wrong? Do you realize how terrified I am that I'm never going to see you again? Yet you have the audacity to act like everything's sunshine and fucking rainbows, because you have no idea what I'm feeling right now."
That got him going all right.

"Believe it or not," it was the first time I had seen him angry this entire day, and a sick, twisted part of me liked it,"I know exactly how you feel! I'm not afraid to die Stiles, but you know what I am afraid of? Losing you," and just like that the anger slipped out of his voice, replaced by fear.
"If I die I loose you, and that terrifies me to no end." He ran a hand through his hair, and had this gut wrenching look on his face as he slid down the wall he was leaning against until he was on the floor.

I didn't know what to feel. Ashamed maybe? Or angry? I didn't care. All I knew was that if this was going to be our last time together, I didn't want to spend it fighting. I walked over to him and took a seat besides him.
He looked away from me, still angry. I sighed before leaning my head onto his shoulder.
"I'm sorry," I whispered. Derek turned his head to look at me, and to my surprise I found tears rolling down his face.
I brought my hand slowly up to his face, using my thumb to whip away the stray tears. When I went to pull away, he grabbed my hand, holding it to his face for a moment before bringing it down so he could kiss the back of it.

"What happens now," I asked, unwillingly breaking the silence. He intertwined his fingers with mine before answering,"I try not to die." He leaned in to give me a kiss, but got interrupted by Erica.

"Derek you should head inside now, we're about to make the mountain ash circle."
Derek nodded, getting up, and pulling me along with him. Reluctantly, we followed Erica outside. Everything felt too real.

I followed Erica and Derek as far as I could before I couldn't go any farther. And Derek turned to say goodbye.

"I'll be back before you know it, pup," he said using that stupid nickname for me he knew I was secretly fond of.
"You better sourwolf," I said using the nickname I knew he wasn't fond of.

He smiled, I took a deep breath, nodding, then let go of his hand and watched him walk away.
But, before he could get far, Derek stopped. He turned back to me, and started running with this wild look on his face. I scrunched my face up in confusion, and barely had time to brace myself before he crashed into me. He picked me up, and spun me around before kissing the day lights out of me. I didn't know how long we stood there, but it wasn't long enough.
Derek pulled away and looked me in the eye, leaving me beyond breathless.
"What was that for?" I asked.
"That was for the fact that I just realized how madly in love I am with you." He told me before he took off sprinting to the hospital. I watched him go, in shock. Derek Hale was in love with me.
Derek Hale was in love with me.

And I loved him too.

~~~~~~~~~~

I hoped, one day, I would be able to say those words back to him.

Hey it's Anna hope you guys like this update this was supposed to be the last chapter but it got too long so there will now be two more chapters instead of one
Lots of love-Anna❤️