The Misadventures of a Horny Gay Teen.

Lace and Ribbon

 A/N Abuse trigger warning from now on. You have been warned.

Eren could feel it. The burning pain in the back of his throat from holding back sobs, he knew this feeling oh too well. But he also knew he must be quiet or his mother would hear and then she would want to know why. He never planned on telling her, it would bring back too many painful memories. He sat on his bathroom floor, his eyes going from his razor blades to the faint scars left on his arms.

"No. Not again." He tried reassuring himself, rubbing his arms. "Never again, You're safe now Eren..."

He wiped his eyes for the thousandth time and stood up, still shaking a little bit. Taking in gulps of air he leaned his knuckles on the edge of the sink and stared at his reflection in the mirror. Shakily he walked out of the bathroom and crawled into bed muttering quietly to himself. "You're okay, you're safe,"

He lay down in the darkness and closed his eyes, willing the memories to go away. His sleep was restless, tossing and turning. All he could see were hands touching his body, between his legs, over his chest and face. He cried for help, for it to stop, but it never did. Then he could see a face. Just the one. It grinned back at him and whispered to him, telling him to keep quiet and do what he was told, never to cry out or call for help, hands slapping and beating him when he tried. He felt so dirty as if no number of baths would be enough to clean the dirty feeling from his body. He felt a mouth on his neck and chest, hands around his waist. They were rough with his body and held him down so hard he could bearly breath. He felt like they were crushing him, consuming his body and ravishing it for no apparent reason. Did it entertain him? Did he enjoy watching him cry? Eren didn't want this yet he couldn't stop it.

"LET ME GO!" He sat bolt upright, sweat pouring down his forehead. He rubbed his arms and looked around the room, a feeling of relief washing over him when he saw his mother hadn't heard him cry out. He checked the clock. 3:24 am. "Shit." He would have to go back to sleep for another few hours if he was to get up early tomorrow for his part time job. He closed his eyes again and his sleep was more peaceful this time around.

He dreamt he was with Levi and they were by the sea, holding hands and walking through the shallows. He tripped over a rock and fell onto the sand, pulling Levi down with him. He cupped Levis face in his hands and placed butterfly kisses all around his face.

The last thing he remembers from that dream was lying on the sand with Levi, holding him close in a gentle embrace.

"BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!"

He woke to his alarm at 7:30 and sat up in bed. After stretching and rubbing his eyes he took a quick shower and headed downstairs.

"Mom?" He said when he reached the kitchen.

"Yes, baby?" She was busy making something that smelled delicious.

"I have work in a while so if anyone is looking for me tell them to call back around 5"

"Sure thing, hey do you want something to eat before you go? I'm frying some bacon and eggs if you want some."

"Oh sure, thanks, Mom." She passed him a plate with two eggs and some bacon and he sat across from her at the table to eat it. The kitchen table had a pot of tea, some orange juice, a fruit bowl and a small basket f toast. The eggs were cooked just right with a soft middle, perfect for dipping bread, and the bacon was crispy.

"How's work these past few weeks?"

"It's been good, some days it's busier than others but we are still getting enough customers so my pay has been staying up." He said, eating his last bit of bacon. "Everyone is friendly towards me so that helps. I just don't want to get in the way now that I'll be working there during the week too because school is finished."