Chapter 49 - Dreams

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I'm on the cliff again, and Zuko's face swims before my eyes.

"Behind you!"

I raise a wall of water, but the blast knocks me forward anyway. Zuko reaches for me, catches me! He's pulling me up and I'm going to make it, it's going to be okay. But the firebender above him is raising his fists for the kill, and his face is no longer that of a stranger. It is Zuko's face, from before.

And my Zuko holds me, keeps me anchored to the cliff, promises to never let me go.

"I love you, Kara. No matter what I will always love you."

The Zuko from before laughs, and the fireball widens between his palms. I can't lose my Zuko. I love him.

"I love you."

I let go, and I fall. But I miscalculated- he betrayed me! He used me, he never changed. Rage heats through me- and then I crash into the water. The pain is like getting crushed. But the crushed feeling is inside me.

I am crushed.

He never loved me.

He lied.

He lied.

He lied.

I float through the water, lost and alone. There is no past. There is no present. There is no future.

There is nothing.

He is gone.

I am gone.

We are gone.

And there is nothing.

He lied.

I wake in a cold sweat and sit up fast, panting. I clutch the blankets to me, trying to focus on the here and now.

To forget the past.

The past does not exist.

The future does not exist.

There is only this moment, in which I am free.

I breathe more easily, deeply. I stand and make my way out of my cabin and to the upper deck. The stars shine bright and cold above me, and the moon's light makes a path sparkle on the dark water.

Captain Kren stands at the tiller, and I wave to him. He smiles at me.

"Going for a late-night swim, Kiri?"

"Yeah. Don't wait up."

He laughs and shakes his head, and I jump over the side. The water enfolds me, wraps around me. Keeps me safe.

I breathe into it, surrounding my mouth and nose with air bubbles so I can breathe. Then I shoot away from the boat, into the depths of the ocean. I center my mind and my body in the feel of the water.

Water adapts, it flows through the course of least resistance. But when it resists it is formidable. That is how I want to be. Need to be.

I flow, but I am also strong.

I am nothing but the path I follow.

I am free.

______

Sooo. How much are you all hating me NOW? Lol kk so I've officially decided that this will be a trilogy... and I have 58 chappies finished in this book! Uhoh y'all are catching up with these daily updates I'ma have to writes some more lol :)

COMMENT and vote, guys!

-Tess

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