Life After Death

The Crestfallen

Back then, times were indeed frightening and troubling. But despite that, it was her that approached Mitsuru about joining S.E.E.S., not the other way around. She was so desperate to find out more of her father's death from her family that she never deeply considered what she was up against. And even with that kind of motivation, she was still fearing the thought of fighting these monsters. Using an Evoker was so much like choosing death, choosing to fight the unknown. It wasn't until Makoto came along that she really felt a strange sense of a true motive...

Although she was frightened of him the night he first arrived, she felt something vague towards him. He wasn't like Junpei or her other male classmates, whom would pester her and flirt. Makoto was just--there. He pretty much minded his own business. It was something she didn't really expect, but didn't know what else she should. She was just left to be surprised by it.

That night, she went to sleep like nothing changed. She was still a second-year and still couldn't summon her Persona. Though the next morning provided and proved otherwise. On the metro to Gekkoukan, Makoto minded his own business, as suspected, listening to his music and staring into the outside world. Just like the night before, he was silent, nothing to say to her. Despite that, his calm, opaque nature immensely affected her outlook. Thankfully, he was too zoned out to catch her eyes on him.

That moment led up to her feeling something different. On the rooftop of the dorm nights later, she tried to set aside her fears and protect him. But upon figuring out he was more than capable of protecting himself, along with her, that left her with only one thing: to repay him every time.

Even without his request, she took it upon herself to heal his wounds. Usually it was only possible if he was staying in one spot, but she noticed he never cared to say behind for her aid. So that's when she held him back before letting him move onward. He wasn't a push-over, of course, but he let her do it anyways, not seeming to care for it much. There were times in the beginning this was all she could do, but soon, she could be a defensive force as well. And then she started hearing his gratitude in the form of words.

Times of battle were the only time she was ever physically close to him. Having to hold him back made things a little less awkward between them time after time. Though she was sure he didn't mind, she felt comfort. Before he started to really talk to her outside of the Dark Hour, this was one of the few reasons she went time after time. By fall, it was just another excuse to spend more time around him.

Despite taking some contentment in his presence, as the days flew on and he remained the same towards her, she felt a bit of doubt. Did he even pay attention to her as much as she did to him? Hell, did she even matter more than anyone else to him? It wasn't something she wanted to feel. She just did. She couldn't ever blame it on his stoic psyche, but she could help but feel he wasn't receiving her. She, too, was always shadowed by the death of a parent, in his case, both. So, with all her might, she attempted to understand, but she was already too deep in the ground.

After a while, she grew okay with his lack of response. She learned that part of having these feelings was accepting him for him. Makoto was Makoto and nothing but fate had a factor in strongly changing him. But even after coming to that realization, the very first time she rose something new out of him, she treasured the special occasion. By chance, one could say their eyes meeting was just a coincidence, but his prolonged gaze wasn't. Her small smile broke his eyes away, though he just sat there, oddly still, before standing. Sure, from a side angle, his silver eyes could be examined, however, seeing them head on was something magical.

The days that followed she felt her gaze and her touch returned. He would look back at her and he would help her up after having fallen. The feeling of getting more than just silence was an enormous sensation. The most she treasured was the occasional hug, whether she needed one or not. No matter, he was always there to listen and take away her loneliness and doubt. And the more they touched, the more they could get in before time ran out.