Dead Politician Society

Chapter 14: Clare

Susannah bit a chunk off her carrot stick and crunched slowly. She pointed the remaining half-carrot at Clare. “You sure we can get the Tree-Huggers to support us?”

“No,” Clare said. “Not sure at all. But Jessica clearly can’t stand Diane, so I don’t see them working together. Do you?” Clare looked at the other nine Commies with the question on her face.

Brian set down the peanut butter and jam sandwich he’d been nibbling at. He still made Clare sad, though she hadn’t yet figured out why. “Depends what Diane has on Jessica.”

Clare cringed. “You mean like dirt?”

Brian nodded. “Diane collects information. She takes the weirdest notes. Like if she was here, she’d write down what everyone was eating.”

“Why?”

“Let’s say I came up with a bill that hurt dairy farmers. She’d say she's seen me drinking chocolate milk to try to discredit my argument. Bad example, but you get the idea. Nothing is too small for her.”

Susannah picked up a piece of celery and dipped it in a Tupperware container of hummus. “I know you feel mean for snubbing her, but what you said to Diane this morning was perfect: that you can’t trade information until you’ve spoken to your party. She will have marked you down as loyal, someone she can trust.”

“Okay,” Clare said. She wanted info to take back to Diane. The more she learned, the more she needed to get to know Diane for herself. “So what can I give her?”

Susannah cracked a smile. “You mean actually give her, or Trojan horse give her?”

“I meant real. I’m not very good at tricking people. But I could, uh, try.”

“No,” Susannah said. “You seem too straightforward for subterfuge. If we go that route, I’d use someone else.”

Clare was insulted for a moment until she realized it was good for Susannah to think she’d make a lousy liar. She continued with the point she’d been making, “Anyway, all I meant was that since (a) Jessica hates Diane and (b) the Tree-Huggers share philosophies with the left and right in equal measure, I’m pretty sure that if we incorporate environmental ideas into our platform, we can keep Jessica and her team voting with us on confidence issues, and therefore keep the government in our control.” This was more politics than Clare had ever understood before, but for once she had more than a hangover to show for a virtually sleepless night.

Susannah wrinkled her forehead. “Diane’s not the only one who might be playing you. Jessica’s not as laid-back as she lets on.”

“What would Jessica play me for?”

“Information. Same as Diane’s trying to do, but Jessica’s a better actor.”

“She’s a double major in chemistry. Aren’t scientists too literal to be tricky?”

Susannah snorted. “She’s also a WASP, despite the eco-hippie track her father tried to take. Trust me, I live with one. They come out of their mothers saying please when they ask for breast milk and convincing them it’s delicious even if it tastes like last night’s wine.”

“Okay.” Clare cringed at Susannah’s imagery. “So what can Diane offer that we can’t?”

“Diane could offer power,” said a clean-cut Indian or Pakistani kid up the table. He had a trace of an accent, like he’d reached puberty in his home country but spent high school in Canada, or maybe the UK. “A coalition government could make Jessica World Leader in exchange for some of Diane’s religious bills being passed.”