Clueless

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I am not sure what to do

I gave birth to you

I kept you safe for five years

I wiped away all your tears


Now I send you off to school 

but feel like I've just thrown you in a pool

before you knew how to swim

Where do I begin....


I was not allowed to take you home

without a carseat from the hospital

when you were born.


I still have you safe and secure

But cringe as we travel 

each morn

next to the school bus. 

There's not even seatbelts

on that thing

And as parents

were expected not to fuss.


For five years you been 

slathered in sunscreen

to keep you safe from the suns rays

And now you've been without for days

I watch as your fair skin gets redder

and somehow have to convince myself 

this is still better. 


For five years you've gotten through

day to day

without a scratch

Now your elbow's bloodied from the slide 

and you've got a lump on your head

you could not hide

And yet no note from the teacher 

was dispatched. 


I get that you need to learn

that 1+1 is 2

But I can help wondering

What I've done to you?

Why I feel as though

I haven't a clue

I know this is all new

for me and for you


Just know I haven't turned a blind eye

Although some days I want to cry

but I will still protect you by far

I'll take you to school and home by car


I'll make sure you have a good lunch to eat

And that you shoes are double tied

that are on your feet. 

As I noticed if I don't

they are left undone,

Don't they know you could fall if you run?


How to reconcile my mind and heart

That I'm doing the right thing 

Allowing you to take part

Of what every child goes through

I just haven't got a clue.


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