「log 13/13」 • day 24, 12.02 am

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This is a terrible idea.

Don't do it.

My stomach feels like it is churning as I get dressed in a rush. Scowling at how cold it was, I run outside, locking the door behind me.

Why do you keep on doing these things that hurt yourself?

Have you not learned your lesson by now?

Or do you just like getting hurt this way? Is that it?

Freaking masochist.

"Owwww." I put my hands over my stomach at the painful feeling and the misery I was going through only made everything ten times worse.

As told, Seven is waiting downstairs with Saeran. I see the two when I look out from the balcony, and I take in a deep inhale.

I was not able to get rid of the redness of my eyes, for one. It made me think; it's amazing that a human can go on crying for so long, yet never run out of tears.

I collect myself before I climb down the stairs and appear at the porch.

The twins are standing with their backs facing towards me, and my legs feel like jelly as I glance at the boy I was deeply in love with.

Oh God, even if I pass out... Please let me pass out after I hear what they have to say.

Dammit, if I pass out right now, how embarrassing would it be?

I'm going to die.

Not just because of my churning stomach, but because...

It felt as if I had forgotten the way his face looked.

He looks so much more gorgeous than he does in my thoughts, and I can barely keep myself calm without my legs giving away and crumbling down.

And as I stand, unable to say anything like the pathetic loser that I am, I see a pained expression on Seven's face when he turns around and sees me.

And the expression remains, until he looks down, then turns to face Saeran.

I don't hear what he said, but Saeran turns his back to face me as well, and the two walk up to me.

"Hey."

"Hi."

Silence welcomes us for a couple seconds, and I don't have the guts to look at Seven; instead, I glance at Saeran. He looks healthy and fresh and has a little smile on his face.

You needed to be saved too, I'm so glad you're safe.

You deserve to have that smile, you need it.

You both have each other now, you both have family, and that's one of the most beautiful things in the world.

Congratulations, I want to say, but I don't have the will to do so.

"Saeran had something to say to you." Seven's voice says, and I take a glance at him. His face is expressionless, and Saeran takes a look at his brother.

"I hope you don't mind, but gimme a second alone with her, will you?"

"Don't... Don't do anything funny, I'm warning you." Seven says before goes to stand near where he parked his car.

"You must think it's weird for me to talk to you." Saeran begins, and I shake my head.

"I wanted to say I'm sorry. For involving you in this, for trying to kidnap you... Everything." Saeran's pupils tremble before he closes his eyes.

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