The Queen [2]

Chapter 1

Serayah

I grew up being thought how to handle things the way an army would.How all problems could be dealt with actions.How all colonisation or contralism had to be dealt with war.How we have to stand up from sorrow and grief by action.

This things I remember could relate to my situation now.It was two days after a 'miracle' happened of me returning back to life and it also has been two days eversince I was brought back 'home'.

We are living in a castle in the nothern hills of nivite.Pretty far from the castle but it was enough for me to feel scared abd traumatised.They had increase the guards and more guards are recruited but the actions still hadn't stop my anxiousness.

I know yesterday that the name of our castle is called 'Surihati'.It is known as a malay term of The Queen of my heart.Apparently in the 15th century one of the crown prince's had married a woman from one of the malay archipelago and settled in trau in this very own castle and as a gift , he named this castle after how she makes him feel.

On the second birthday of rafaella she was given this castle as a present from the late king and queen or in other words both neymar and rafa's parents.But she have never used it and it is pretty unique and maintained well that she had given permission to use this as our new home while the castle in 'New Trau' gets repaired.

I was still in a wheelchair.I have not gained enough energy to stand as I am both mentally and physically tired.

Though Neymar had make time for 'us'.But what really went down between us is just plain nothing. I refuse to acknowledge his presence despite him trying to get back to where we were before everything went down. We had our bedroom but really when we go to sleep at nights there are so much distance between us that is covered with pillows.

We take walks in the new castle.But really I have no energy to talk to him.As I was full of grief and anger.

"My queen,The king has requested to see you."One of the servants announced and I nodded and zar (who was thank god protected and safe from the attack) wheeled me out of the room and towards his new office.

"Leave us"Neymar said as I entered the room and zar excused herself and close the door behind her.

"Sera"He said but I continued to stare out of his office window."Leave me alone."I stated."Just leave me be."I murmured."I tried baby,I tried and I can't.It feels like I'm married with a ghost,it feels like I really lost you in that attack." He explained while kneeling infront of my wheelchair.

I did not answer him instead I look him in the eye."Tell me the truth." And his eyes change ,his demenour change."I will but not now,not when we're like this.Not when you're still grieving." He said.

"No!Don't use my sadness and my weakness as a reason for you not to tell me the truth.The truth why I had lost millions and millions of people.My father and godsake our daughter!." I took a deep breath "Tell me now so I could understand why it happened why do I have to lose everyone!Tell me so I could grieve more,So I could have a reason to fight this grief.So I could have someone to throw my anger at and not only you."

"Because I'm tired of staying up in the morning crying.Im tired of having to have a heart full of anger and void.And the only person or the only reason I could blame was you and our marriage." And I could see the pain in his eyes but I kept breathing and kept reminicing."Because if I hadn't marry you I would still have my father." I said slowly.

"Don't say that you know its not true"He said but I shook my head "It is,It is true neymar but we're too blind to see it!"I said.

"Our marriage had affected us.Look where it brought us,look where it brought everyone else around us."I said "Whatever the truth maybe,I have a strong feeling it is about us and our marriage." and with that I left him and called for zar.

It was dinner time and I had to take davi.Who was not well eversince the attack.Doctors said he was traumatised and needed to see a psychytrist but really all he needed was a parent love. Because eversince I came back he have been nothing but a total angel and I'm glad that I could light his world the same way he could light mine.

We were joined by rafa,my mother,sister,my niece and brother-in law. We were having a quiet but calming dinner,davi was sat accross me with rafa next to him.My mother was next to me.She claimed that she felt fine but really I know better.Next to rafa was serane in-which mark set accross her. The doors opened to reveal a frustrated neymar.

"How nice of you brother, to join us."Rafa announced his presence in which he rolled his eyes and gave me a peck on the head and one more on davi's.

"You're only eating that?"He asked once he saw my plate was just a spinach and few fruits.I gave him a look and he looked at me with a concern look."I'm not really hungry."

"Nonesense you barely eat serayah.And you need it more than ever." He said and I was so ticked off."Why? is it because I am weak and stuck in a wheelchair and unstable because we lost our child,sorry but no thank you!"I said and with that I angrily wheeled myself out of the dinner table and towards the door.

I heard him let out a tired sigh.And I let out a few profanities as I wheeled myself out.

Neymar

I watch as serayah wheeled herself out. I let out a tired sigh.I have been trying so hard for this past few days.I am but I just seem to lose hope.

"Neymar,son.She is undergoing what we call-Grief." Her mother state and I nod.

"I know it is ma,but she isn't just the same.I have been trying!I am but it isn't working.She isn't the same anymore.She is constantly angry,she pretends I'm not there.She regrets our marriage. She should know that I am hurting too,I lost a friend and our baby.Instead of going through this together she is pushing me away.its hurting me the way how she's acting now because though she did all that I still love her."

"Give her time.She is only in the phase one.Anger."And with that she left just before she said that she was going to talk to her.

"Hey neymar,be there for her tommorow,she needs your support more than ever"Serane said as the rest of them followed after her to return to their bedrooms,I was left to have dinner alone and then I started to wonder what was tommorow.

That is when it clicked,Wilters funeral.

Nissa Mail🕊

Hello!I know 'Nissa Get off your phone you're supposed to be studying!"

Well sorry guys but I cant help it,I just wanted to start writting!.