I sighed and put my phone down, not even bothering to text him back.
I walked downstairs and saw my mom on the couch with a blanket tossed over her legs. I sat next to her,"Mama, I need to talk to you."
"Of course, baby," she held up the blanket and I sat with her. She smiled,"What's wrong?"
"I uh .. I have to tell you and dad something but I'm scared of your reactions," I said, fumbling my words and biting my nails.
"Don't bite your nails, honey," she said softly, holding onto my hand,"You can tell me whatever you need to."
"It's," I took a deep breath and swallowed the painful lump forming in my throat,"It's not that easy, mama."
"If you want to, go upstairs and think for a while and tell me when you're ready."
"No," I said, tears starting to fall down my face,"I need to tell at least one of you know and get it over with. I'm just glad I'm telling you first."
"Well," she brushed my hair with her fingers,"I'm all ears."
"I'm ..." I sighed,"Mama, I'm gay."
***
Justin.
I came home from work and saw that the living room was dark and empty. "I'm home," I announced, but I didn't get an answer.
I walked around the downstairs, and saw a pizza box yet it was empty. "Damn, daddy doesn't get any dinner?" I mumbled to myself, throwing the box away and turning the light off.
I marched upstairs and found both of them in Caleb's room. She was asleep on his futon and he was staring out the window.
"Hey, buddy," I said softly,"What's wrong with mama? Is she sick or something?"
He shook his head,"No, she came up here with me and we fell asleep. I just woke up," he faced me and his face was puffy.
"Are you okay?" I asked, walking closer to him. Camryn suddenly woke up and rubbed her eyes like she was trying to understand how the universe worked again.
"Justin," she said groggily.
"Camryn, go to bed baby."
"No," she said, standing up,"Caleb has to tell you something." I turned back to Caleb,"What'd you do? Something bad?"
He shook his head in fear,"No, dad, I never do nothing bad. You know this," he said defensively.
I narrowed my eyes,"Then why are both of y'all acting weird?"
"I'm gay, dad," Caleb spat out,"I couldn't hold it in and hide it or I swear I was gonna kill myself. I don't like girls, I like Nicholas."
My eyes widened,"What?"
Camryn gasped,"Justin don't say it like that."
"Say it like what? I'm just making sure I heard what he said."
"He's gay. He told me he's been gay since he was 9 years old. He dated those girls since he wouldn't be 'suspect'."
I blinked,"9? It's been close to 6 years and you haven't told me or Rose?"
"You know what would've happened if I would've told her. I would've been a disgrace for ruining her perfect God loving family. And you, no boy wants to tell their dad they are gay."
"You could've told me, I'm not just any dad. You think I would've disowned you or something?" I said in all seriousness.
Caleb shrugged,"Anything could happen."
"Come here," I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly,"Don't ever keep anything away from me for that long, no matter how bad you think it is."
"I'm sorry, dad," he sobbed,"Im so sorry."
"Sorry for keeping it from me?"
"Sorry for not being the big manly athletic son that likes big butts and titties--"
"Language!" Camryn yelled in a hushed voice, making us smile as we wiped our tears.
"Son, I don't care about none of that. As long as you continue to be the nice, smart son that you've been, I'm fine with anything. I love you, boy."
He smiled at me, and this time it looked different from any other smile he has ever done. Maybe because he was finally happy, he could be himself without having to be afraid.
"Ok, " we broke apart,"Now back to business. Y'all ate dinner without me?"
***
"Camryn, I freakin' love you girl," I said, pinching her little booty that rested under my white t shirt. Little asses matter too.
"Why all the love?" She giggled, hoping onto the bed and straddling me while I rested my hands on her hips.
"You handled the whole situation well until I came home. You're really a ride or die, Cammy. I appreciate you for treating him like that --"
"Justin," she chuckled,"All I did was talk to him, stayed with him and calmed him down. I'm his mama-- that's what I'm for."
I nodded in understanding and she leaned down and kissed my lips.
"Did you have any idea, though?" She asked me.
"Not at all," I said,"That's why I was shocked. He hid that really well."
She nodded,"Nicholas, huh?"
I laughed,"I had a hunch about him, though."
"Little Nicky? No," she chuckled.
"You see the way he looks at Caleb," I pointed out. She shrugged,"I didn't pay any attention to it, boys are weird."
"At least we know that our son has a loyal one," I said as she rolled off of me and into the space next to me.
"That makes both of us," she said, squeezing my hand.
"Oh yeah!" I sat up,"I completely forgot."
Her eyebrow raised,"What..?"
"My mom's visiting tomorrow. Her flight comes tomorrow morning."
She punched several blows to my bare chest and I felt myself wheezing over from her hard fists.
"Not even that deep, baby," I coughed out,"Step beating my ass and you know I can't beat yours."
"You didn't fucking tell me! Oh my God, I'm really meeting your mama tomorrow! Dammit, Justin."
"What's the big deal?"
"I could've got my hair done so when I get off work I can be all nice for her. Fuck, and then I have to get up even earlier in order to straighten up the house before I leave for work."
I chuckled,"Babe, chill."
"No, you chill!"
"It's been a year, I've told her about you. She knows you're completely different from Rose so she loves you already."
"Ugh, Justin dammit don't tell me shit last minute. You know I hate that shit."
"What's the big deal? I met your mom," I reminded her. It was so cute seeing her spazz out over this. She was nervous.
"That's different," she groaned.
"Eh, you'll be 'aight."
Her head shot to me quicker than I could get a breath out,"I should fucking backhand yo' ass right now, nigga."
I laughed,"Go to sleep, Cam. You got work in the morning."
She grumbled words not worth repeating before turning the lamp next to her off and tossing the cover over her head.
My little baby was nervous; how cute.
