My Unknown Friend ❣

Fake as real

I'm finely at home !
I kiss my dad and I go to my bedroom ;
I'm torn between call Brad (my best friend)  or listen to music ... But finely I choose to call Brad .
So I take my phone and I call him ,but he doesn't replies... Come on , not him !! I need him right now, he can't let me down too ...
Life seems so fake , but we easily understand that life it's not fake and even real ... between the real and the fake there's a lot of little things, a lot of doubts, a lot of questions, a lot of life...  And here I am,waiting again; and now I'm a little too tired to wait !
I'm tired to wait , I'm tired to cry, I'm tired to listen, I'm tired to talk, I'm tired to show people that I'm tired... And I'm tired of being tired
Pretty stupid, right ?!
I go to the kitchen , and I can see my dad cooking some food, I look to our house and the only thing I can see it's a fake life, a fake family, a fake happiness
People always tell me that the fact of my mum died doesn't means our life needs to die too, but they don't feel what we feel, they don't have this dark soul that we have.
They have just a lot of sweet words and a lot of sweet positivism and a lot of happiness... They absolutely know what is wake up without sun, they know what is wake up with pain, they know what is have no reason to live, and maybe some of they know what is lose someone you really love;
But I'm sure they don't know Anything about me , they don't know anything about my story and they don't know that my life right now seems NOTHING!! But let me tell you what me and my father have :
Food,
House,
Work,
Love,
Pain,
Emptiness,
And darkness
That's all we have, and all we can give since my mother's death
We pretend to be ok, but now our life seems like a glass which was broken and you need to change for a new , but the difference it's that we can't change life and not even buy... We can't because it's not in our power, in our hands, cause we don't know how it was made of ,
Cause all of us have different views about that, cause in relation to life we're vulnerable...
I want to take her back but I can't, I'm so selfish but she was the happiness to this family, she was real and she's not anymore
Now there's me, my father and the world
There's my dreams and my emptiness ,
And there's Bradley, my best friend  and the only one who I know will always be there to help me, you know... he's like my refuge, my save spot, my left hand ( cause I always need it to write lol), well he's the one I can count on

Dad: Carolyne ?!!!
Me: yes ,what's going on ??
Dad: i just want to know how was your day
Me: amazing
Dad: sure ??
Me: of course yeah
Carolyne's P.O.V
What he was waiting ?? That I will telling him about my pain ?? My stupid day or even my jerk ex-boyfriend who broke up with me 1hour ago ??

Dad: well, we have a visit today
Me: what?? Who ??
Dad: someone; I'm sure you will like her
Me: her?? Aunt Alice is visiting us ?!
Dad: no darling, you don't know her yet, she's coming here to know you
Me: okay don't waste your time, I know that's all to tell me that you found someone new ,and etc right ?!com'n dad , I'm not a kid anymore!
Dad: carol that's not what you're thinking
Me: really ?? You're cooking good food, keeping with a big smile on your face, and telling me that you're happy to have an visit after all this time escaping to every date, every friends or family's dinner, and even every kind of new meets
Dad: you should be happy, I'm trying to be a great family for you again
Me: I am ! But you're doing this for you ,not me
Dad: I'm doing this for...
Me: we all;
I know! anyway, you should stop pretending like I'm always a kid fine?
Dad: I wasn't !
Me: I've got to meet Brad , see you later
Dad: Carolyne , wait... You can't get out like that ! It's 9:45p.m
Me: oh come on !! It's fine
Dad: no it's not fine, you will not...
Me: oh please, stay with your new girlfriend , maybe she's even better than mum for you... But I need to see Brad fine ?! he's my best friend you know that , and I need to meet him Now
Dad: carolyne I'll pretend that I don't heard your words , you'll come back inside home and stay for the dinner, that was clear ??

*i slam the door and keep walking until brad's home *

I ring the doorbell and wait someone come open the door, hoping that will be Brad