once broken, now fixed | m.c & l.h

no longer home

michael

I return home.
Summer is officially over.
Not that it matters.
School doesn't exist to me anymore.
It is time for me to grow up and be an adult.
I don't want to, I wish I could spend another year or two being stupid and careless with friends.
I want to go to college and make someone proud but without my uncle and without Luke there is nobody to impress.

My uncle passed while I was away.
I haven't accepted it yet.
He was right.
I should have never left.
My friends that I wanted to spend my summer with so badly are just somebody that I used to know.
My uncle was so wise.
I should have listened.

They're demolishing everything.
There are trucks everywhere.
My home is gone.
No longer home.
I'm homeless.

My birthday just passed.
I'm eighteen now.
An official adult.
I haven't heard from them.
It has been nearly five months.

I left to the city without Luke.
Luke is no longer apart of my life.
I found a job in the city.
I have an apartment now.
My refrigerator is full of alcohol.
I used to promise myself that I would never drink but look at where I am now.

I watched the news yesterday.
Ashton ended his life.
I lit a candle to make a wish for him.
I wished for him to finally be at peace.
I remember when Luke told me that Ashton was hurting himself again.
What kind of piece of shit person was I to not help him?

I miss home a lot.
Though I shouldn't.
It is no longer home.
I need to stop missing the place that isn't mine.
I need to stop missing the place I hated.
My past must be forgotten.

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