Ten of Me ✓

Thirteen

ERIN

I hesitated on that front step for a long time, listening. The normal sounds of the evening--cars, voices, music--continued on around me as if I were completely insignificant. Nobody seemed to care that I was about to completely defy my parents' wishes, and even though I didn't exactly want to disappoint them either, I knew I had no choice.

I pressed my weight a little more firmly on the wooden step, testing it while holding onto the windowsill tightly. I was petrified that the whole contraption would break and I would tumble to the ground in a mess of splinters and broken glass. Then what?

When the entire staircase didn't immediately collapse under my weight, I placed my other foot on the step and then let go of the windowsill. No alarms sounded and I didn't fall--and now, I could practically taste the freedom.

The wood on the staircase had splintered and the individual steps creaked as I descended. Mom had kept meaning to call someone to take out the entire staircase, but she hadn't gotten around to it yet, and now I was glad. I now knew that it was my only path of escape now that my father had started his habit of grounding me whenever I misbehaved. I didn't want to think about how long he'd ground me if he found out I was sneaking out to go to Noah's house.

Once I got down into my backyard, I exhaled an enormous sigh of relief and then hurried to get on the sidewalk. My head pounded as I thought about my father driving home from his business event and catching me walking on the streets, and I doubled my pace.

I was at Noah's house only minutes later, not even winded from the short walk. My finger came down on the doorbell again and I felt transported back to the previous night. Maybe this time, everything would end better. I still regretted my anger; after all, I texted other guys, and I was acting jealous and selfish to say that Noah couldn't do the same.

The door opened and I saw Noah on the other side, his eyes wide and concerned.

"Hi, Noah," I said, smiling. He continued to stare at me, a questioning look on his face.

"Are you selling something?" he finally asked.

My mouth gaped open, and my hand caught the doorframe as he tried to gently close

the front door in my face. "Noah, it's me. It's--"

And then I froze. I hadn't changed. I hadn't washed out the hair dye, and I was still wearing the same pink shirt and ridiculously skinny jeans I'd worn to the skating rink.

I was still Erin.

My heart was pounding a mile a minute and I thought I'd pass out from the realization. Had Noah recognize my voice? Did he already know it was me? And how would he react if he found out? I realized my only escape was to be calm and confident, like I knew exactly what I was doing. "You don't know me," I said smoothly, forcing myself to recover. "I saw you play football once. You're really something."

"And you're at my house because...?"

He trailed off and I left the question unanswered between us, knowing I had to act quickly. I pushed open the front door and stepped into his house, immediately enveloped in the messy coziness of his living room again. Hooking the door with my foot, I shut it behind me and then started kissing him.

I expected him to push me away, or at the very least act startled, but he just kissed me back, so hard that I found myself pressed up against the front door only seconds later. The doorknob dug into the small of my back, but I didn't even notice a bruise forming. I knew that the second I stopped kissing him, he'd ask me questions, and then I'd be in trouble.

He was the one to break away first, but he kept his face close to mine. My breathing was rough and I finally became aware of the pain shooting through my lower back.