prologue
"One iced coffee, black extra shot."
He turned his back to brew the straight coffee, adding one extra shot of caffeine like I asked and then poured it into a foam cup filled with ice. I paid quickly, grabbing the cup and leaving without a smile or a word.
I liked my coffee cold and dark, just like my heart. I spent years learning how to tune people out of my life and grooming my heart so that it was as bitter as straight coffee. And in the case of the coffee, I spent years perfecting the perfect cup of coffee, tuning out the creamer and sugar so it was just simply black and cold.
Oddly enough, I hated the taste of it, but I figured after awhile, my tastebuds would get accustomed to the bitter taste and like it. I made that theory about a year ago, and still the taste was horrid to me. It burned the back of my throat and made my tongue shrivel in pure disgust. But yet I swallowed it, and drank it every single day.
Sometimes to ease the bitterness, I would suck on the ice cube that had frozen residue of the coffee, and it wasn't that bad.
The whole idea was figurative, now that I think about it. Signifying my cold and bitter heart, and drinking it thinking that maybe one day the two horrible things turn into something good. Two negatives equal a positive.
Sometimes I just take things too literal. Holding the cigarette in my mouth to signify how I could so easily kill myself just by smoking simple cigarettes, but having the power to stop myself. I kept my furniture and other belongings away from my clock because time was a thief. And maybe that's why I kept my heart so cold, so bitter, so hidden. It's not breakable if it's already broken. It's not breakable if you can't find it. It wouldn't hurt if your heart is numb. No one can love a cold heart, just like no one can love iced black coffee.
It's impossible for a normal guy to love a broken heart, such a bitter soul.
But if my theories are correct, don't two negatives equal a positive?
honestly im not going to update if it has less than 10 reads and 5 votes
