Reason to Live

IV

Ethan POV:

The bank of elevators behind me fades away as I hurriedly walk down the endless hallway. It's very quiet. Silence fills the room. So silent you could hear a pin drop. Clink.

The hallway seemed endless as I glanced at every room number I passed. Numbers upon numbers and I seemed to be hundred away from Cameron's room. The hallway seemed to stretch like fresh taffy a child would eat on a summer day.

513. I was there. I made it. I stopped for a second and then proceeded to opening the door.

Cameron lay there with my mom at her side. She looked terrible. Not in a rude way but like...she didn't look herself at all.

"Oh thank God you're here." Mom exhaled as she jumped up from her seat and rushed over to me. Her face was a dry riverbed after a harsh summer as she wrapped her arms around me.

"Hi mom" I managed to say as she squeezed me: what she called a hug.

"Ethan!" Cameron exclaimed behind mom. I glanced over mom's shoulder and it looked like Cameron was about to jump out of her bed.

"Hi Cam!" I said happy and relieved all af once. "Oh my God how are you?" I asked as I walked over and gave her a big hug. She slightly flinched from the pain that shot through her body.

"Oh I'm just peachy" she laughed and coughed. She sounded so weak and fragile.

"What happened?" I asked, kneeling down at her side. Mom brought over a chair and I sat in it, still making eye contact with Cameron so she could tell the story.

"It all happened so fast. One moment we're exiting the freeway onto the off ramp and the next I'm looking at Grayson's body hanging above mine." She said, making eye contact with the blank wall in front of her.

"Aw sweetheart" Mom slightly cried as she rubbed Cam's forehead and gave her another hug.

It was another long while before Cameron finished her story with details I don't want to get into.

"This is my fault" I confessed as I got up.

"What?" Mom asked in shock, "How?"

"I had to have my stupid tutor session this evening and I totally could've driven myself but I let you two take me and this definitely wouldn't have happened if I just went by myself" I said, raising my tone with every worse that left my mouth.

"Oh my God, Ethan this was totally not your fault why would you even think this." Mom said, also getting up from her seat and walking around the bed to comfort me.

"But it was mom. If I took myself they never would have been in that accident and look at where Grayson is now. He's getting fucking surgery God's sake!" I exclaimed. Mom lightly gasped and whispered "language" in a harsh tone.

"I'm sorry mom but this is all my fault and I don't know what to do I just love him so much-" I breathed in the old, depressing hospital air quickly and cut myself off. My eyes shot open and I became anxious at her response.

"Well of course you love him. I love all three of you so much. But honey, this most definitely wasn't your fault so stop saying that and enjoy your time with your sister and I. It could have been much worse." She comforted, completely brushing off the fact that I just said how I truly feel about Grayson. I can't blame her though. I'm his brother. Of course I love him. But I love him more than a brother...