The Final Countdown

9

I've started gaining weight, eating more. Food is the only thing I can depend on to be there, I know that I can have every meal no matter what. I'm being made fun of, but that's nothing new. I've gone up 3 sizes in the last 4 weeks. Maybe this is why my girlfriend is drifting away.
My parents are mad at me because they think I'm trying to make them spend more money by getting them to buy me bigger clothes. Can't I at least try to feel comfortable in my own skin?
     I've started to let the charade slip a little at times. Allowing myself to be tired, sad. I tell myself to snap out of it, but to no prevail. No one really cares anyway, I doubt.
     People seem to look past me or through me Even my girlfriend, the rare times I see her, has started doing it. If I felt like nothing before, what do I feel like now? Or can I even feel anything.
     I understand society's wants. For everyone to be happy, friendly, and kind. How far has that dream disappeared? Like, I understand the whole "be happy, just smile" thing, I really do. I try to feel happy. But with the sitting alone, having stuff thrown at me, and the ridicule, I wonder if anyone could be.

A/N : Sorry I haven't really been keeping this up, I just forget to. I'll hopefully post most if not all of the book today. Sorry about the wait darlings.