Molotov Heart {Alex Summers | X-Men}

. hiraeth .

original timeline | 11577 words | no relevance to main plot | violence tw

we start with small talk, but
we know that it's not so
we take our time 'cos it feels like we're dying

She’s nineteen in this universe, when her life finally begins, amid this this fallacy that she’s built with for herself around these men. Now, she’s a Cassidy in looks alone, her entire being made up of things she’s borrowed from those around her. When she speaks, it’s with Charles’s British inflection, cut with Sean’s New Jersey drawl, when she walks, it’s a self-conscious slump she’s mirrored from Hank, just as she had appropriated his name only months before to fool the government. The only thing left of her heritage is the rage she lets fester inside, the disgust she feels knowing that there are mutants dying at the hands of their government, and Charles won’t lift a finger to help. But soon enough, even her fire, her passion, is a borrowed ember from a brighter blaze.

Raven looks as though she’s been dragged through hell by the time she gets to the mansion’s doorstep. A broken, bloody mess, she has nowhere else to go, refuses to say where she’s been, can’t even bring herself to look Charles in the eyes, so he stops trying. It’s Aoibheal who nurses her back to health, who listens to Raven’s criticisms about the world when she’s too sleepy to be on guard, who eventually earns her trust. Like Charles after Cuba, Raven has been broken in ways that no-one else could ever understand, but it’s so much worse. Raven’s lost everything, her life, her love, herself, surgically removed until all that was left was a burning desire for revenge. The night Raven leaves is the night Aoibheal finally shows her the scars on her chest and throat. Raven’s breath catches. The look in Aoibheal’s eyes is so familiar.

“Come with me.” Raven finds herself saying, offering Aoibheal her hand without hesitation. A long moment of silence stretches between them, and for the briefest moment Raven is worried that she misread the girl before her. Instead, Aoibheal takes her hand as a handful of clones scatter to collect supplies, look of soft determination on her face.

“Of course.”

your laugh echoes down the highway; 
crawls into my hollow chest,
spreads over the emptiness

The worst part about leaving wasn’t having to stand up to Charles (finally, finally) about how she is who she is, not who he sees her as, it’s saying goodbye to Hank, her brother, her confidant and best friend for over a decade. He wants more than anything to ask her to stay, to warn her that Raven’s a bad person and that she’s safe here, but he hates lying to Aoibheal more than anything, and so he lets her clone sob against his shoulder.

“I have to do this.” The clone feels so real, it’s breaking his heart.

“I know.” He rubs soothing circles against her back, eyes closed; he doesn’t want to remember her like this, determined yet distraught in the moonlight. He’s well aware that she doesn’t know how he and Charles can just sit by when mutants are being mutilated under the guise of experimentation, but to hear her watery voice ask if Charles even cares- Hank doesn’t cry. “I know.” Is all he can manage. Though he wants to ask her why the clone’s even here, he knows the answer; Aoibheal is his all but sister, and after years of Charles’s neglectful behaviour, finding a kindred spirit with Raven’s drive must feel like a godsend. “Take care, okay Blue Blood?” Holding the clone at arms length, he finally looks at her, and when she smiles at him, it’s watery but so hopeful, and he feels so weak, unable to protect his sister from the horrors of the world. This must have been what it was like for Sean. Pressing a kiss to her forehead, the clone vanishes, and Hank is left alone with his thoughts, that the great Charles Xavier doesn’t even have the powers to read.