Twenty three

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"Uncle said you two got a restraining order against him."
I grinned.
"Yes Mum, we did."
"Now why in the hell did you go and do that for?" She growled. My mother didn't shout when she was angry. She spoke soft, which was scarier.
"He attacked Aaron, mother!"
"That's no excuse! He's still his uncle and you both have to respect him!"
She rolled my eyes, trying to zone out so I couldn't hear her anymore.
Just then the front door opened.
"Anyway I have good news," she continued.
"Sorry mum, Aaron's home!"
I was surprised at myself. Talking to her hadn't dampened my mood as much as it usually did.
"But I wanted to tell you I'm..."
I cut the call.
Aaron's head popped round the corner.
"Oh you're here," he said, a smile spreading across his face.
"Yes," I laughed gently, and took his hand. "I have a surprise for you. Close your eyes."
He looked anxious for a second, his gaze flickering warily to my face and away again, but then he chuckled too.
"Ok," he obliged.
I led him into the living room. The lights were off, candles lit on the dining table.
"Dinner is served," I smiled up at him, and slipped my robe off to reveal the red slip dress I wore underneath.
Opening his eyes, he laughed. An open, honest, hearty laugh that showed all his teeth.
Then he kissed me. Long and deep and lingering, it took my breath away.
"Thank you," he whispered, and went to take my chair out.
We were grinning stupidly and giggling at each other, not taking this seriously for a moment, not taking ourselves seriously.
"Enjoy," I said, and for a while we were quiet, savouring our food.
I looked up to see a fork waving in my face.
I blushed and giggled, then accepted the mouthful.
He smiled at me, suddenly shy, looking up through his impossibly long eyelashes.
"I love you," he said softly.
"I know," I replied indulgently. But it took me a little by surprise. He'd never said it before.
He chuckled, then got up suddenly and swept me off my feet.
"Come here," he growled, and threw me over his shoulder to take me upstairs.
I screamed delightedly, kicking my legs and grabbing onto his shirt so I wouldn't fall.
"We can finish dinner later," he read my mind as always.
He put me down on the bed and started to take his shirt off. I reached up to stop him.
"Lets take it slow," I said, and he smiled kindly.
We both knew where this is going and it made me more nervous than I'd ever felt before. And yet there was excitement too, curling in under my heart.
I wouldn't have it any other way.
He sat down on the floor in front of me so his chin rested on my knees.
"I love you," he said again, but expectantly this time, like he needed me to answer.
"I love you too." My voice was shaky, my cheeks hot.
He reached up, cupped my cheek, pulled me down for another kiss. As it deepened I sensed his need, and it grew more urgent. His lips were hungry over mine.
He got up and gently pushed me onto the bed while coming down with me, so that we fell sideways and were facing each other. He wrapped his leg around mine and kissed me again. His hand slipped up my top and made soft circles on my skin.
I had to remind myself to breathe. I didn't dare to close my eyes because of the face I'd see, coming out at me from the dark. I took big gulps of air, trying to squash the fear that engulfed me.
He noticed.
"Are you ok?" He asked.
"I am trying to be."
He nodded, thoughtfully.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
My eyes widened. I shook my head vigorously.
No I do not want to talk about it. I don't want to make it real. I don't want you to look at me different. Like I am wrong and broken and strange.
"How can I help?" It was a simple question. And yet it meant so much. It filled me up and, unexpectedly, tears spilled over.
Why am I always crying?
"I don't know," I whispered, and my voice broke.
"Oh hey, hey," he said, and sat up, pulling me into his arms. "It's ok. We don't have to. We're in this forever, I can wait."
I shook my head again.
"No. No more waiting. This is not who I am. I am stronger than this."
"You are the strongest woman I know," he said.
I leaned in and kissed him, my eyes wide open so I could focus on this beautiful man. I didn't ever want to stop seeing him.
He stilled, just letting me take the lead, his face perfectly serene.
I reached up and started to undo his buttons.

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