Virgin [sʜᴀᴍᴇʀᴏɴ]

IX

The priest thinks it's the devil, my mum thinks it's the flu, but [boy] it's only you

One Direction

     Shawn had been sad as of late, sad like that time that his box turtle (Gregory) had died, sad like that time that he'd lost his appetite for a month and dinner time consisted of his eating the smallest fraction of his plate before he felt nauseated and couldn't down anymore. Shawn was sad like the time that he had told Cameron Dallas that he'd fed him verbal placebos for as long as he'd remembered.

     Father Magnus had told him that 'the devil was riding his back.' That that was the reason for his sadness, and even though Satan was wicked to cells of his spirit, but he -Shawn- didn't just go around blaming others for his problems

     He wondered what Cameron was doing, if he was riding in family jets or visiting hockey arenas; or if he was just as miserable as he was. Shawn didn't want any of those things for Cameron.

     Shawn didn't bother with visiting Falls church that Sunday. In fact, he made his bed at St. Lutheran's which housed the majority of those indifferent to him. He didn't mind however, and ignored their looks of disdain that burned, but didn't quite compare to what it felt like, being separated from Cameron. If Shawn had to be forthright, he honestly didn't care about what they thought.

     Maybe it was because he was angry, and sad; fueled by emotions. He didn't care because he was angry and sad. Aaron had accompanied him to the sister church, mostly keeping mum, and most certainly up in his brain about his troubles.

     Cameron wouldn't just leave Shawn's mind. It was almost like all of those weeks ago where Mindy or Cindy had offered him baking tips in an attempt to stop him from getting intimate with his boyfriend. And so then he was up in his head as well, caring not for the priests babbles about the Biblical relevance of Babylon.

     When the service ended, Aaron escorted Shawn out, and Aaron turned back to observe the churchgoers.

     "What's up with them all? They've been giving you some really bad stink eye." Aaron furrowed his brow. "Like the entire time we've been here." And Shawn averted his gaze, fixing it on his best mate.

     "I don't know." He lied smoothly. Lying; he had become too good at it, and he absolutely loathed it down to the tiniest granule that by which it existed. "Scratch that, umm let's just say I've turned into a goat in the cathedral toilets once or twice." And it wasn't technically a lie, what, with its double meaning.

     And Aaron seemed to ponder something, looking straight ahead before opening his car door. If there was one thing that he was grateful for, it was that he wasn't at his usual church. He'd usually have to stay behind for about an hour to do electrical cleanup, as he played the keyboard for the choir save for when he allowed Jacob the role.

     Shawn rested his head on the glass of window, he wondered what Cameron was doing. When didn't he? What if he had moved on? What if he'd taken up Cindy and Mindy's offer? And it wasn't too bad of an offer, they were beautiful twins who were willing to share the same man.

    The Canadian lad felt almost as if he were going to cry. His throat grew tighter as the thoughts of Cameron being with someone else swarmed his brain. Even if he was--Shawn figured, Cameron would never love anyone with as much complexity as he had loved him. He loved him in ways that he hadn't been aware existed.