The Boy In The Mirror

Four

A girl sat on the edge of a queen sized bed that had a Victorian aura dug into its depths, the neatly folded thin, crimson fabric that will have to do as a blanket through the cold winter months; not that Hazeh cared about getting cold. The room itself could be the definition of depression, the walls were not black but the darkest grey Hazeh had ever seen. Cracks shattered the ceiling above, looking like it could fall down at any moment, there was a black oak wardrobe in the corner, when Hazeh opened it moths flew into her face so she stayed away from it. Her eyes were closed tight and her hands were clamped together, her fingers clenched onto each other as if she let go so would her sanity.

Her parents didn't wish her goodnight like they used to, or even peep their head through the door to check up on her, she even left the door open a little for them. After hearing light switches turning off she knew they weren't coming and that they were still upset with her. She was sure she hadn't imagined it all and that this wasn't a dream; was she going crazy? It would make sense, her father had depression in his teenage years and her mother had schizophrenia for a few months after getting married to her father, not a story they like to tell.

Once asleep, Hazeh only dreamt about the same dream she had in the car, except this time when she saw something glinting at her foot, she picked the ring up the floor and slid it onto her finger. The ring was a family heirloom passed down from daughters to daughters, the only thing Hazeh had ever treasured, she lost it on the day of the bombing. It was made from silver and had a blue stone, she wasn't allowed to be told which type of stone it was until she herself became a mother. Losing the family heirloom was just another step towards her unknown future.

Walking aimlessly through corridors, avoiding mirrors to not jump into an existential crisis, Hazeh tried not to think about anything and everything. She did not believe in ghosts or haunted houses because there were no solid proof of them ever existing, until now. She knew if she told her parents they'd just think she was trying to scare them off, if she told anyone else they'd think she had gone mad. Had she gone mad? She wasn't sure.

Her mind was drowning in her own thoughts, if she was alone she would've screamed until her throat went hoarse, but she wasn't alone, not physically. Hazeh felt the most alone she had ever felt, she wondered if the whole universe had turned against her. She decided to go back to her room before she got lost in the endless maze of corridors. In her room she didn't find herself any more tired, she only felt agitated, the room didn't bring her any happiness either.

She listened to the birds singing soulfully, not wanting to go downstairs and have another awkward meal with her parents, she pretended she was somewhere else, a different universe perhaps where she could do anything and everything, she wouldn't have to worry about war and time that her species made up. A small robin flew onto her windowsill and watched Hazeh as in thought, she did the same. Making her jump, the robin started to scream in pain moving about as if it was having a fit. Hazeh ran up to the bird to try and help it but as soon as she got close it's small neck twisted earning a deafening crack, it looked Hazeh in the eye once more and fell out of the window.

Hazeh did not eat nor listen to her parents slow conversation, she only tried to not think about the thoughts swarming and clouding her usually sharp mind, she had never felt this feeling before and she did not like it. She wanted to throw up or cry in a corner, neither were good options in front of her parents. Both her father and mother noticed Hazeh's strange behaviour but either thought she was giving them the silence treatment or was trying to catch attention.

Her father worked as a doctor before they came to England, he was the most skilled and intelligent man in their town; Hazeh was rather proud of having him as a father. He wasn't always stern with his children, him and Hazeh were extremely close in her childhood but when she began to get older he decided to pass her to her mother to be more 'ladylike'. It wasn't as if he didn't love his daughter, it was more of the fact he loved her too much, when his son died, as selfish as this may sound, he didn't want to be attached to Hazeh in fear she too would die. He blames himself for his wife's illness, his son's death and his daughter's endless sadness, it was his duty to protect his family from these things, wasn't it? Whenever he woke to his beautiful wife's face he is only reminded of how much of a terrible person he is, he took what was left of his family and persuaded them to run away with him, because he was a coward or because he was worried for his family's sake? Neither we or him knows.

Her mother was quite the opposite, she married Hazeh's father as an arranged marriage from both parents, she was already in love with a childhood friend at the time and didn't want to marry. For the sake of her future her childhood sweetheart left for America to not make things complicated for her and persuaded her to accept the marriage. Hazeh's mother was a very proud wife once she realised she had married the best man possible for miles around, she would always boast about how perfect her little family was to all the neighbours and friends. She began to get schizophrenia when she had her first miscarriage, she was in denial for years and began to believe everyone was on some practical joke and that her baby was still alive. Ironically, that's what made Hazeh's parents become closer and love each other for who they were. After Saad she became scarily quiet and never spoke about her 'perfect family' again, not that now she had anyone to talk to except her husband and her daughter. Sometimes she spoke to the moon and pretended Saad was still alive and was speaking to her via the moon.

Hazeh caught some parts of their conversation that quietly flowed into her mind, something about finding work and renovating the house, speaking of which, after her midnight stroll liked the old, mysterious house.. not that she was going to admit it.

Noticing her parents had left the table already Hazeh wandered into her room in a daze, not looking anywhere near the window, just as she was about to sit down her father knocked, and casually strolled in.

"We're going to start renovating today," he clasped his hands behind his back to hide his nervousness. "And we'll be starting on your room as I have a slight suspicion you don't like it very much."

Hazeh nodded slightly.

"You can either help by beginning to move things or you can go for a walk and explore the village we passed in the car."

He left the room.

Hazeh was still nodding.

"I..might as well help," she looked at her bed. "It might take my mind off things for a while."

With a few pushes and pulls she had moved the bed into the middle of the room, it was less heavier than she thought, or she had gotten stronger, probably the first. Scratching her back she noticed something peculiar in the wall where her bed was.

There was a little door.