I maxed out my other rant book, so here I am lookin' for the good bleach to drink.
My rants are lit. My life is shit. Please pass the bleach because I can't reach it.
I'm chill though. I'm open to share a glass of bleach with anyone, let's have a...
When my brother walked by me, he was already shaking his head at me, so I started laughing. I sent him those pictures I posted, and he was like "Is it about your boi?"
I literally die LAUGHING because my mom made the weirdest expression, cause she was like "There's about you haven't TOLD me about?!"
I had to explain the "ya boi" vs "your boy" because he didn't finish the whole sentence.
So when my mom finally got up from the couch, I started laughing again. She goes to look at the tree, she's like "Where is it?! I can't find it!"
Me: Mom, it's an ANGEL, where do you think an angel's supposed to be?
Mom: *looks at the top of the tree* Who the HECK is that?!
Me: *bursts out laughing*
Bro: *snickers*
Me & bro: It's ya boi Guzma!
Mom: *laughs and snorts*
Me: That's why I said I needed a printer.
Mom: I'm glad you made it! There's more Christmas spirit in the house!
Me: Oh god, not AGAIN.
Bro: *quickly puts headphones back on and continues playing Pokémon Sun to ignore rants*
Me: *glares* Lil butt.
Sometimes he can act like a savage, I'm not even joking.
For lunch we had popcorn chicken, and I had two dinner plate-fulls of that shit. For the past week I've been begging for something like chicken strips, so we got these.
I saved like, nine pieces for myself, and just now my bro pulls it out of the fridge.
Bro: *inspects chicken* Is this chicken for you, Chloe?
Me: *raises eyebrows*For my STOMACH.
Mom: *snorts*
Me: Mmhmm that's right, that is MY chicken boi. That's what you get for not helping me unload the dishwasher twenty minutes ago.
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