Sketch the Stars

Chapter Four

These friends keep talking way too much

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One second, I'm walking in tense silence with Atlas next to me, the next there's a shiny, red, disfigured circle-looking thing right in my line of view. I glare at the object, then at the hand holding it. My gaze follows the arm attached to the hand to Atlas' face. My head tilts in confusion. Is this some sort of friendship ritual? Do friends give each other weird red objects?

"Do you not know what an apple is? C'mon, Autumn, you're like... twelve, right? You can't seriously tell me that your parents never explained what an apple is." An apple? Is that what this red thing is? Where did anyone get the idea for calling it an apple.

People in Nivalis are weird. Then again, I'm in Nivalis, so I guess I am weird, also. I shake my head in response to his question. I didn't know what it was, but I do now. "My mom couldn't tell me everything about Nivalis before the Break... I wish she could've."

His smile is reassuring, and I actually believe him when he says it's okay. "Well, apples are food. So, basically, you eat it." He holds his hand out once more, tilting the apple in my direction. "Here's to you hopefully eating your first apple."

I slowly reach out and take the apple. I turn it around in my hands. Hopefully. I suppose there isn't much hope anymore here in Nivalis. I suppose it could not hurt to give him some hope. If I cannot gain any, it would not hurt to help him so he doesn't reach the same point of hopelessness I have. I smile something small before taking a bite.

I generally wonder how many of these things- apples- he has. I hope he has many more, because I doubt I would be able to live without eating at least one more. I wonder where he got it from. I glance at the apple once more. I've eaten much more than I intended to. How selfish of you, Autumn. Not even sharing with Atlas. What would your mother think?

I've missed the Void, but now that it is back, I regret missing it. It must've known how I missed it and returned. Now that I feel the ice in my skin that had once turned into a welcoming warm, I realize that I've grown used to being without it.

Now that the Void is back, it seems it has decided to come back rudely. Perhaps the Void feels replaced. That would explain why it is calling me selfish.

I do not know, though. I do not know if the Void itself knows. No, the warmth is back. I believe the Void has calmed. No, I am wrong. It is not the Void warming me, but someone's hand near the back of my neck. I flinch away. Touch is unfamiliar to me, and as of now, unwelcomed. I quickly turn, smacking away the offending hand.

Atlas looks generally shocked at my movement. I suppose I should be sorry, I had forgotten he was there, but he laid a hand on me without permission. We both have things to be sorry for, I suppose. I do not know who should be more sorry, however. Should I? Should he? I do not know.

he's holding his hand to his chest. I do not know why he looks so hurt. I do not believe I hit hard enough to damage him. I tilt my head at him. Do I apologize? My mother did not teach me how to react to such situations! I do not know how to react, so I do not. Distractions are not good, but walking is, so, that is what I do.

"Hey, where are you going?" No distractions, just walking. No distractions. None. "Autumn! Hey, s-stop for a minute!"

Then his hands are on me again, but not near my neck. This time they are restraining me and turning me around by my arms. I struggle, inching back once I am free. Why does he not know manners? Perhaps not. I mean, I don't, so why would he?

"Gods above, Autumn, what's the rush? One second you've stopped completely, and the next you're hitting me and walking off. What's got you so skittish?" I don't remember stopping. Is he as delusional as I am? Who is he to question me? I should be questioning him! He is the one who placed a hand on me!