lost in your mind ✧ joshler ✔️

trois

"it is a part of the
human experience
to feel pain do not
be afraid open
yourself to it."

- evolving // rupi kaur

—

"want me to sing you a song?" tyler had asked, he had come prepared for this. josh didn't know what to say. of course, he had known that if he had said no, tyler would've most likely sang it anyway. but, josh would have loved hearing tyler sing again. the way his soft warm voice almost compared to his soft gentle features, it was jaw dropping to the redhead.

"i'd like that," josh said. he was already feeling the wild sensation he had felt throughout his body when tyler sang. even before he had started to. it was a tingly feeling that he could not describe but he liked it a lot. tyler laughed quietly as he picked out his ukulele from behind his tent. josh waiting patiently for his dear friend to start his song. a song particularly for josh.

tyler closed his eyes, humming quietly before beginning his tune. he had his maroon colored ukulele in hand, ready to strum. josh sat cross legged on a log near the burnt out campfire. tyler opened his eyes again, simply to have a good look at josh. josh could sense tyler's eyes scanning him and he wished to do the same. josh didn't know how to react to this so he just pretended to not notice. tyler giggled.

"don't worry, i was just thinking," tyler said to reassure josh. josh was puzzled. what was he thinking about so deeply that he had to stare at josh like that? josh just shrugged it off and revealed a sly smile. "what were you thinking of?" josh questioned, still ignoring eye contact with tyler. tyler again thought through what he was going to say and took a short breath.

"i was thinking about what song i was going to sing to you. but, i know now," tyler smiled, clearing his throat and closing his eyes once again. he had a straight face on but it quickly changed into a smile. but, what made him so happy? it wasn't like josh made anyone happy. tyler was calm. he barely moved. his breathing was so steady and relaxed.

one, two, three, four, five, breath in. one, two, three, four, five, breath out.

josh didn't say anything and sat silently, he could only hear tyler's breathing and his own heartbeat. but, considering he was in a forest the rustling of bushes and plants were heard making sudden moves and it made josh feel—okay.

"ruby i hope
i see you, i've
waited all this
week for you to
walk my way
your soul will
capture me"

tyler strummed his ukulele for what seemed like mere seconds and then he stopped.

"ruby you're royalty,
in your homeland
they all call you
queen. tell me
where are
you from..."

tyler's lips moved perfectly along with the song, although he had stopped strumming his ukulele. it had just been his voice that filled the empty air. but, then tyler stopped. he just stopped. he was just not breathing normally. "tyler, you okay?" josh questioned him, his hand on top of tyler's left shoulder, showing him some support. tyler was just left frozen, staring into the abyss in front of him.

the sun was soon to set and tyler was still nowhere near moving. "tyler, what's wrong?" then after a moment of silence, tyler began breathing like normal again. he took his breaths five seconds at a time. he turned his head to look over at josh. josh didn't move.

"j-josh, i can't sing you this song," tyler said looking directly at joshua who was utterly confused. "you—what? why's that?" josh asked him, his voice cracked a bit; his hand still placed gently on tyler's shoulder. josh could tell that tyler was scared, maybe nervous of something. but, he had no clue of what it would be. after all, tyler was extremely open about his talents. he was a pretty gifted human being after all. tyler put his hands over his eyes as if trying to prevent josh from seeing his tears.

"it's n-not meant for you," tyler finally said. his voice was a bit muffled but josh was able to make out most of what his friend had to say. josh was very puzzled. "how come?" he questioned tyler. tyler didn't want to give an answer, but knew he'd have to come to a conclusion as some point in time.

"i don't want to talk about it," tyler mumbled, he removed his hands from his face and he didn't seem to be crying. only a bit saddened for some unknown reason. "that's okay," josh said as he patted his friend lightly on the back. tyler just sat there with josh, he felt horrible for not giving josh a decent answer. he felt horrible for not singing the entire song to him. but, the last time he sang a song to someone it turned out horridly.

—

this is a short chapter compared to the other two 😂