'do you think i should kill myself?'
his head snaps round to face me, the book in his hands dipping slightly.
'jesus, em-'
'no. i don't want 'jesus', or 'no!' or 'course not!'. i want your answer, and i want it now. i want it truthfully.'
'emilia-'
'i don't want to hear 'no' because you will feel bad. i want you to tell me whether i should kill myself or not, because right now, things aren't going well. and i want to do something about it.
and i've exploited every other option.'
he tuts, looks back down at his book. dismissive.
'you're being ridiculous, em. you're an idiot.'
resigned, i look back down at the page in my hands.
wrong answer, i think. and then i shut the book, and roll over onto my back.
~~
an excerpt.
