Prompt: You're mowing your lawn at 5AM and that is completely unacceptable and I'm going over to your house to yell at you about how unacceptable this is AU
Characters: Darcy Lewis, Elena Rodriguez aka YoYo (AoS), Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers
Tags: Female Friendship, Female - Male Friendship, Humor, Agent!Darcy, Agent in Training, Steve & Bucky Are Together (If You Squint)
Joining SHIELD after SHIELD had miraculously risen from the ashes, and had enough sway with the public to bring Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes back into the States without having cuffs slapped on their wrists was probably the best decision Darcy has ever made.
Moving into the secret SHIELD neighborhood community, however, was possibly her worst decision ever made. But only after, you know, living there for months before the new SHIELD Director decided to give her neighbors of the super-soldier variety.
"I swear to Thor, Yo-Yo, if you don't stop ogling them I'm going to tell Mack-Attack about this. You know how moody he gets when your eyes wander."
The Latina Inhuman sighs wistfully. "Pero son tan guapos."
"Yes, I know they're handsome." Darcy's lips twitch. "And I also know that besides being hella lethal, they're hella smart, Yo-Yo. Enhanced, too, which means they can probably hear our little back and forth right now, and also understand what you're saying since Barnes speaks like a million different languages."
"Sixteen, actually," said man yells from across the street.
Darcy groans as her friend chokes on a laugh, she weakly waving at the two super-soldiers who are now staring at them as they drink lemonade on their porch. "Three days. They've been my neighbors for three days and already we're the weird neighbors who can't keep it in their pants."
"Speak for yourself," Elena continues to chuckle. "I've got Mack back at base. You're all alone in that big bed of yours." Darcy's eyes widen as her friend waggles her eyebrows while gesturing across the street. "Maybe one or both will help you warm your bed."
"Shutup!" She hisses. "That's not funny."
"It is a little!" They hear, again, from across the street.
"No one's talking to you, old man!" Darcy immediately retorts, eyes narrowing at Barnes since Rogers has his face planted in one hand as his shoulders presumably shake with laughter.
"Tan lindo," Elena coos.
Darcy's head falls back with a groan even as her friend cackles, she shooing her off back to base before doing something drastic.
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Having super-soldiers for neighbors loses it's shine nearly two weeks in. While both men are ridiculously handsome as Yo-Yo pointed out before, Darcy knew there had to be a flaw somewhere in there and nearly two weeks later she's found it.
Having spent all morning and day training with Agent Johnson under Agent May's watchful eye, Darcy is relieved to be home. One soothing hot bath, and a pizza and three beers later, she falls into a deep sleep without much trouble. At least, she was enjoying a deep sleep until the motor of a lawn mower started up.
Her eyes snap open and after taking a moment to realize that yes, someone is cutting their grass while it's apparently still dark out, Darcy's gaze darts to the dim red numbers on her night stand. "You've got to be fucking kidding me," she mumbles.
The lawn mower shows no signs of stopping anytime soon and Darcy frantically kicks off the sheet that had tangled around her legs. She stomps over to her window and sure enough, James-Motherfucking-Barnes is walking up and down his lawn with the monstrous machine that lets no one sleep.
Mindful of their other neighbors- because Darcy is a great neighbor, dammit!- she doesn't bother screaming her head off from the second story of her home. Instead, she whirls around and marches out of her bedroom and down her stairs. She completely bypasses putting on any shoes and temporarily forgets that she's wearing a very small pair of sleep shorts and a tank top. She only realizes her mistake when she feels a breeze caress every inch of visible skin, but by then she's already halfway across the street.
When Bucky catches sight of her, he slows to a stop and releases the little bar atop the handle to let the motor cut out. "It's five in the morning, you imbecile! This is completely unacceptable and very un-neighborly!" Darcy shouts, hands planted on her hips as she stops halfway up his sidewalk.
Bucky, the jerk, merely smirks as he takes in her attire. "Sorry, doll. Our internal clocks have always run earlier than most."
Darcy gulps as he clearly looks her up and down. "O-our?" The front door to Bucky's home creaks open and Steve steps out, completely wide awake and dressed as if ready to take on the day. "You're both heathens," she grumbles. "It's sleepy-time, boys. Knock this shit off," she then says while pointing at Bucky and the lawn mower sitting innocently before him.
"Yes, ma'am," Steve tells her. "Sorry about waking you, agent Lewis."
"You're forgiven, soldier." Steve practically beams at her and she nervously fidgets before directing her ire at it's rightful target. "Your boyfriend, however, is not."
Bucky chuckles. "Aw, Lewis, you wound me."
"I'll do more than wound you if you decide to mow your lawn again when I'm sleeping. Seriously, Barnes, you could have at least waited until the sun came up. Or better yet, mow the damn lawn when you know I gotta be in early at base. At least then I'll be gone before you start. It's my day off, you jerk."
"Aye, aye, gorgeous," he winks at her. "No lawn maintenance on your days off."
Darcy glowers at him one last time before turning to march back to her own house, she grumbling beneath her breath all the while. "Stupid soldier-soldiers and their charming smiles. This is literal torture. What the hell was Director Mace thinking putting them next door to me?"
"He was probably thinkin' the same thing that pretty little friend of yours was sayin' before; that you needed someone to keep your bed warm at night." A pained grunt comes from Barnes and Darcy doesn't need to turn around to know that Rogers most likely jumped off the porch to slap his other half upside the head.
Darcy's closes her eyes and briefly pinches the bridge of her nose as she hits her sidewalk. "I'm going to kill Yo-Yo," she mumbles.
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My Spanish is very limited. I'm talking like.. three or so words limited. Lol. I just found a handy-dandy online Spanish dictionary that translates sentences rather than one word at a time. Hopefully it's correct.
