Autumn Leaves (Ed Sheeran)

Chapter Three.

All he wanted to do was find her full name and run to her. As beautiful and captivating as she was, he couldn't be with her. Taylor ruined his trust, his ability to love. He had nothing left because of her.

The visions of her were flooding back into his mind. Her smile, her laugh, her innocent face when she took his song book and made him chase her around the house to get it back; it all was coming back to him at once. His eyes watered again at the last memory he had of her: the look on her face when she said she didn't love him anymore. Her lipstick was so red he couldn't tell if the part of her lip she was biting was bleeding or not. Her eyes were filled with tears, but he was too absorbed in her unreasonable excuse of leaving him. She had no real reason; her friends have said so themselves. They were talking about marriage just weeks ago, and now...

He wiped the tears and shrugged off the pain the way he'd been doing the past few days and turned to the journal. It was as therapeutic as writing in his own, but having questions answered relieved a lot of the stress he withheld. Hopefully this would be the last journal entry he read before he tracked her down.

Dear Diary,

I can feel myself slipping away from reality. Pretty soon, I will tie a rope around my neck so he doesn't do it himself. I'm not saying I want to die, but I'm not saying I want to live; I have no reason to be here anyway. What ever was my purpose for being born? Was it to be thrown across the room as if I were a lightweight, and watch my heart break piece by piece every morning I wake and remember my mum is gone? Was it to lose the people that are dear to my heart for no apparent reason? Lucy's cancer was getting better, so why did she die?

I can't do this anymore. Maybe tonight I'll go. I can see it now: RIP Autumn Rae Edmund, the girl they all forgot. I doubt my father would even purchase a tombstone to remember me with anyway. They'd all forget about me.

I'll just go now. Goodbye.

Yours Truly, Autumn Rae

Slamming the book shut with relief, he called Stu and began his search. "I got it," he exclaimed. "I got her name."

"Well what is it, Ed?"

"Autumn Edmund."

"Alright. I'll hire a good friend of mine to check her out. But can I ask you something?"

Ed hesitated. "Uhm, sure. What is it?"

"Before I help you track down a stranger and lie about who she is to another stranger so you don't sound like the cheeky bastard you are, what exactly do you want to do when you find her?"

The thought never crossed his mind about what he would do exactly to help her. He guessed he just figured he would assure her that everything will be alright and then what? She goes back home, suffers again, and punishes herself? It wasn't going to be like that; he wouldn't let it. He shrugged. "I dunno, but I will help her. Count on that."

"Hey, it's your call." He hung up, leaving Ed's mind in a whirl for the second or third time in just days.