Blind Insanity

14 - Chapter Fourteen - 14

14 - Chapter Fourteen - 14

I have always had an uncanny memory, well most of the time.  There are blurred pieces in my past just like everyone else, but starting from the time that my parents shipped me off to the institution, that was when the uncanny ability to remember was a curse.  There was not much that I forgot about the time that I first arrived.  I didn't think about it often just because there had been a hope that mama and papa would come to rescue me.

'We had been so afraid.'

Perhaps it was my brother visiting that made me remember what had happened that day.  His arrival had my head spinning and turning in confusion.  That was what I thought it was, his visitation was just the start of the memories that would be coming at me once again.  Memories that I wanted to put away forever and never think of them again.

'We had been so terribly sad.'

That day, my brother and I had been in his room.  He had a bunch of toys when I had nothing and I wanted to play with them.  Our parents had never taken the time or wasted the money to get me anything.  That day we had been playing with his toy cars, cars that were small and the wheels spun really fast.  We had been trying to race them, I used my favorite bright green blue one that I had dubbed as 'mine'.  With so many cars at our feet, I had kicked a red car that had gone under the bed.  I had chased after it.  He had told me to not go under the bed that he would get him himself.  But I didn't listen.  I crawled under the bed and grabbed the red car.  The car had rolled to the very back where it had been stopped by the wall.

When I climbed underneath there, the darkness under that bed, even in the middle of the day, had always sent chills down my spine.  It wasn't the darkness that terrified me, it was what the voices were whispering to me.  They were telling me things that I did not want to hear and made me want to cry.  Instead of coming out, I stayed underneath there listening to them.

'We had tried to warn you.'

As they continued to whisper, it made me huddle further under the bed.  They whispered of my parents talking on the phone.  When my parents were around, they were keen to tell me what they were saying even if I may not want to hear it.  And at that moment the voices were telling me that they were calling someone to take us away.  The voices never lied to me and I myself had heard the heated arguments between the two of them.  They had been yelling about me for some time, and even though I was only five, I understood those words that stabbed at my heart.  So when the voices told me what they were doing, I believed the voices.

I had always believed the voices over my own parents.  My parents always lied to us, telling us things that we knew were not true.  Even when I was young, I knew a lot considering my age.  The voices had taught me to be alert and to learn so very young.

My brother had asked me what I was still doing under the bed.  His blue green eyes looked at me in the far back against the wall.  I pushed the red car to him and told him that mommy and daddy were going to send me away.  That was what the voices had said anyways.

Even though I talked about the voices, my brother was someone that didn't pay much attention to the words.  He never really put much thought in my talking to the voices; to him I was just being me.  He was eleven at the time, so he thought that I had just made them up because I had no friends and our parents didn't put much time into me.  He was frowning at me when I told him that I wouldn't be seeing him again.  Ah yes, the voices told me that I would not be seeing him ever again.  I think that was what stuck in his mind more than anything on that day.