[HUX]
Pardon me, are you Kylo Ren, sir?
[KYLO]
That depends, who's asking?
[HUX]
Oh, well, sure, sir. My name is Armitage Hux, I'm at your service, sir.
[KYLO]
I don't like this.
[HUX]
Sir, I heard your name when seeking my new co-commander and got sort of out of sorts with some friends of yours, I might have shot them, it's a blur, sir, they're called the Knights of Ren?
[KYLO]
You shot at my henchmen?
[HUX]
Yes! I wanted to do what you did, kill some things, then join the revolution. They looked at me like I was stupid, I'm not stupid. So how'd you do it? How'd you get here so fast?
[KYLO]
It was my own destiny that led me here at last.
[HUX]
You're ambitious? Of course! I'm ambitious!
God, I wish there was more war!
Then we could prove that our Empire is worth fighting for!
[KYLO]
Can I buy you a drink?
[HUX]
That would be nice.
[KYLO]
While we're talking, let me offer you some free advice.
Plot less.
[HUX]
What?
[KYLO]
Fight more.
[HUX]
Huh.
[KYLO]
Make sure they know what you're against and what you're for.
[HUX]
Now, let's be real.
[KYLO]
You wanna get ahead?
[HUX]
Fools who run their mouths off wind up dead.
[MITAKA]
Yo yo yo yo yo yo
What time is it?
[MITAKA/REY/PHASMA]
Show time!
[KYLO]
Like I said
[MITAKA]
Show time, show time! Yo!
I'm Dopheld Mitaka in the place to be
Two pints of space meade but I'm working on three
Those resistance folk don't want it with me
Cause I will pop chick-a pop these ops til I'm free!
[REY]
Yeah, yeah, shut your faces. The name's Scavenger
The newest member of the Resistance set
I came from a junkyard just to say 'come back'
Tell Snoke to back off
Who's your fave? C'est moi.
[PHASMA]
Brrah! Brrrah! I am Capitan Phasma
Up in it, lovin it, yes I heard ya mother say 'Come again?'
[MITAKA]
Eyyy
[PHASMA]
Lock up your warriors and starships, of course
It's not hard to defeat armies of nuisances
[REY]
Wow.
[MITAKA]
No more stalls, pour me another brew, sir!
Let's raise a couple more
[MITAKA/REY/PHASMA]
To the Resistance/First Order!
[MITAKA]
Well, if it aint the prodigy of the Supreme Leader Snoke!
[PHASMA]
Kylo Ren!
[MITAKA]
Give us a verse, drop some orders!
[KYLO]
Good luck with that: You're taking a stand.
You spit. I'm 'a sit. We'll see where we land.
[SCAVENGER]
Booo!
[MITAKA]
Sir, this war's imminent. What do you stall for?
[HUX]
If you stand for nothing, Ren, what'll you fall for?
[MITAKA/REY/PHASMA]
Ooh
Who you?
Who you?
Who are you?
Ooh, who is this kid? What's he gonna do?
YOU ARE READING
HUX | A SPACE MUSICAL
FanfictionA Hamilton parody inspired by Aiambia on YouTube. The first song was completely done by them, but every other song was parodized by us. We do not own anything except the reprised lyrics. *strong language included
