"It" Can't Be Helped | ✔️ | Blue Exorcist

With a Fake Smile

I do not own Blue Exorcist, sadly...

"Mr. Okumura.... Mr. Okumura! Nii-san, Wake up!"

Rin awoke with a jolt as a hand shook his shoulder, the tired teen looked up through his bangs to see a frustrated Yukio, as usual. Mr. Spotty Four-Eyes never seemed to smile anymore, at least at him. His eyes always seemed to contain some discontent or anger, his voice always stern or exasperated. Rin rolled his eyes, glancing over to his left to look at Shiemi. She was focused on her work, eyes glued to her cram school textbook.

Rin sighed and sat straight, stretching. "Sorry, teach, guess I didn't sleep well last night," he yawned.

Yukio leaned forward, palms flat on the table, and stared at his brother at eye level. His words came out smooth and contained, yet filled with contempt. "Don't give me that excuse, Rin. We sleep in the same room, you're asleep when I get home AND when I wake up. Get ahold of yourself." Yukio stood and turned away, walking back to the front of the room. "Don't forget the extra assignment along with the one I just gave you. Pages 101-107, read them and know the material for tomorrow." The bell rang.

Pssh. How the hell does he always do that? Perfectly time his words so he looks all professional. Four-eyed mole face...

Rin gathered his belongings and stood up, but not before glancing at the page Shiemi had open in her textbook. Page 99, we started on 78... He sighed once again, looks like he had 30 pages to study tonight, along with his regular school work.

Rin made his way back to the dorm he and Yukio shared without interruption. All of his 'friends' stopped talking to him after the incident while camping. He had tried to explain that his anger had never been directed at them, and he would never hurt them intentionally.

"Intentionally! That's just it!" Bon had his fist near Rin's face, shaking it. "You could always hurt us 'by accident.' I don't know about the rest of you guys, by I ain't taking any chances with this devil's spawn."

The older Okumura slammed the dorm room door behind him, not really caring if he would break something. "Fucking Bon, he doesn't know anything. He's perfect for fucks sake!" He slammed his hand against the wall, "by accident..." voice quiet now. He closed his eyes, leaning against the wall he just abused.

This sucks, I may be Satan's son, a half demon, but I'm still human... he ran his hands through his hair, pulling at the strands at the back of his head. No one cares about that detail, though, do they? All they see is a monster, a weapon. His grasp went slack, hands slipping from the mass of black atop his head. A weapon.... there was a loud bang as he threw his head back into the wall behind him, the pain rattling through his skull.

Rin sighed, pushing his pathetic self loathing to the back of his mind, and stood up, walking over to the desk near the window. Yukio normally had meetings or missions he needed to attend after cram school, leaving Rin alone until late at night. That gave him enough time to catch up on Yukio's lessons and do his homework for high school. Rin wished he could have more time to do cram school homework, but on an average day, he could only study the work before he got up to prepare dinner for Yukio.

The blue eyed boy sat down to finish his daily tasks, yawning, humming, and frustratedly crumpling up notebook paper whenever he decided his answers weren't sufficient enough. After what only seemed like a few minutes he looked out the window and saw the last of the sunshine peaking over the horizon. Sighing for the hundredth time of the day, he put away his studies and made his way down to the dormitory kitchen.

He decided on making Yukio's favorite sashimi as a way of apologizing for.... well, everything. Although he definitely preferred sukiyaki over raw seafood, he let it go. Cutting the raw fish thinly and expertly, he carefully placed each strip on a platter. Taking a moment, Rin decided he hadn't made enough, looked at the clock, and put himself to work making some sushi rice for nigiri. When finished, he wrapped the last few sashimi strips over the balled vinegared rice and placed them next to the rest on the platter. He washed his hands, grabbed the platter, and put it on the lowest shelf in the fridge. He wrote a note to Yukio, telling him where dinner was, and went back upstairs.

.oOo.

Rin sat in his bed staring at the three true cross candles he had set on the floor in the middle of the room, concentrating on his blue flames. Breathing as steadily as possibly, and flowing his heart beat together with his mind, he wiped his brain of all problems and emotions. Then, he let go, aiming his thoughts and - hopefully - his flames at the candles on the right and left.

The wicks lit.

There was a quiet stirring in the air, almost as if the atmosphere was just as surprised as he was, and boy was he surprised. The look on the fifteen year old's face was almost the exact same as when a kid in junior high had brought in his Dad's hustler magazines and shoved them in Rin's face. The awe didn't last long, however, as a wide, toothy grin appeared on his face and his tail started happily thumping on the mattress.

"Rin? Are you awake?-" The blue eyed boy snapped out of his reality at the sound of Yukio's voice, seemingly coming from the end of the corridor. "My meeting wasn't as long as I'd anticipated, so I'm back early." Rin jumped out of bed, grabbed the candles while simultaneously cinching the flames and threw them under his bed. Then he flung himself under the covers, feigning sleep.

Shit! Yukio will be pissed if he finds out I've been practicing with flames in our room. I'll ruin the floor or something. Rin heard the door open and the sound of boots approach his side of the room. Then, he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, gently shaking him. Play it off, Okumura. The older brother groaned as if he was just awoken from a deep slumber and felt another gentle shake.

"Nii-san? You okay? It's only nine o'clock at night, you should still be awake. Do you feel sick?" Rin grasped at the opportunity and groggily told his brother he wasn't feeling his best, but he was okay and just wanted to sleep. He heard Yukio hum and make his way back out of the room, but his footsteps stopped by the door. "Nii-san...?" Rin hummed in response, "are you okay?" The older brother opened his eyes, turning over to look at his sibling, brows furrowed. Yukio's eyes flashed with concern, but he turned his head back in front of him, tracing the wood grain with his eyes. "It's just, you don't seem... you. Maybe I'm just overthinking it." Yukio turned his whole body to face his beloved brother. "Are you okay, Nii-san?"

Rin realized he wasn't asking about physically, but if he was okay emotionally. Thoughts of his fellow classmates flashed through his mind. He shoved the horrid memories away and changed his expression into a happy one. "Yukio, you're always so worried. I'm alright, just my usual self." Rin gave a small laugh and a fake yawn.

Yukio's eyes shifted, still concerned, but he digressed. "Alright, go to sleep, Nii-san. Oh! Did you eat?" He was halfway out the door.

Rin hummed in agreement, he just wanted Yukio out, even if it meant lying. And it worked, the younger boy continued his way down to the kitchen, closing the door behind him.

Rin turned back over to face the wall, suddenly feeling groggy for real. Maybe I can tell Yukio about my flames...sometime. Not now, there's too much going on. He'll be happy, maybe.... would he? Either way, guess he's happy no matter what I do, as long as I don't mess something up. His thoughts drifted back to his "friends," and those were the thoughts that followed him into his dreams.