bracelet ➝ bamlisa 『✔ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇᴅ』

10.5

i vaguely remember the first time we encountered each other. i was feeling bored and lonely back then. my parents had gone to work while my siblings went out with their friends. i was home alone. that's why i decided to head to the park, hoping to find some of the neighbouring children i was acquaintanced with. but the park was deserted.

i sat on one of the swings, lightly fluctuating myself back and forth. a few minutes later, i was humming a familiar melody. it didn't take long until i saw a pair of unfamiliar shoes in front of me. and those crappy-looking overused snickers belonged to you.

"h-hello...?" you stuttered. i looked up, immedietely meeting you in the eyes. blinking a couple of times as i scanned your face, we had a little staring contest before the silence broke.

"who...?" i asked, trailing off. you smiled genuinely. i took notice of your features then. you had plump lips, almond shaped eyes, dark brown orbs, a medium sized nose and dark hair swayed to the side.

"hello," you slightly bended down, indicating a respectful bow. "i just moved her today. im kunpimook bhuwakul. but call me bambam." you spoke with such enthusiasm.

i blankly stared at you which i guessed must have made you uncomfortable by the look developing on your face. silently, i stood up from the swing and took one step forward. i smiled. a genuine one this time. "my name's lalisa manoban. nice to meet you, new neighbour bambam."

that's how i remembered meeting you. it wasn't special or anything like the dramas. but somehow, it was enough for me and i liked it. it was just right.

it took months before we began to develop that special friendship of ours. and during all those months, i was developing something else to. it grew and grew every single day. sometimes faltering but yet to return eventually.

it was a feeling i do not know. everytime i see you, i can't seem to take my eyes of you. my eyes keep on searching for your existence nearby. my thoughts often about you. there are times i feel shy when you're physically close to me. times when a wave of a variety of emotions such as envy, sadness, anger and sometimes resentment comes and go in an instant. it was a strange feeling.

it took me quite a lot of time to figure it all out. i was in love with you. i laughed at myself when i first discovered what this strange feeling was. it can't be. why would i fall for a scrawny short boy like you?

but then again, it was a fact. i was and am. but here's a question, do you feel the same way i do? i had no idea. i kept this feeling for myself instead of confessing it to you. a year passed by then. i decided to confess this time.

but you left before i could even tell you. i regretted not telling you about it much earlier. i thought if i did, perhaps you could have stayed. i regretted everything. i kept telling myself what a coward i was.

that regret developed into sadness. that sadness developed into anger. and instead of getting furious at myself, i directed it all on you. i blamed you for leaving. for breaking our promise. you could have at least said goodbye. but you didn't and never said a word.

i despised you. but then again, i loved you.