Encore (Prodigy: 3)

Fascination

Locke stared at his hand for a moment that was still clasped on Zane's, then looked up at him.

"Now that's hardly playing fair," he muttered, his voice hoarse.

"Well, sometimes playing fair doesn't get the desired results," Zane said, releasing his hand.

"It's not fair to ask me to stay when you're the one who is going to leave."

"Well, there is no reason to stay if the other person is going to leave," Zane said, reaching down and tapping Locke's wrist. "Are you really asking me to stick it out just so I can be the one to put you in the ground?" he asked, turning away and walking to the first aid box filled with all the things needed to treat Locke's injuries.

"Richard stayed with his husband only to put him in the ground."

"Richard's husband did not die by his own volition. He was old, death happens to the best of them and he was far from the best. You are barely twenty-seven. You have barely lived and you want to die." Zane turned towards him, unfolding the end of a roll of bandages. "I'm not brave enough to stick around and watch that," he said, his voice low.

"What did this mean?"

Zane looked up and Locke held up his hand where Zane had kissed it.

"What did this mean? Was this just a trick to try and make me stick around, because you know what you mean to me?"

"What do I mean to you?" Zane asked, walking back, raising Locke's hand so he could bandage it.

"You know what you mean to me."

"I don't, what do I mean to you."

Locke looked down. "I'm fascinated by you," he muttered.

Zane just shook his head to that. "That's not what matters," he said, securing the bandage. Locke looked at him. "Fascination isn't good enough. Fascination can lead to all sorts of situations, good and bad – but fascination is merely an interest. A strong interest. I'm fascinated by you as well but is that all you want?"

Locke narrowed his eyes at him. "Fascinated has never meant mere interest whenever I've said it to you," he said, his voice low.

"No? What does it mean then?"

Locke looked at him, opened his mouth then paused. "I don't want to talk about it," he said, walking past.

Zane caught his hand. "We can't keep dodging the subject forever," he said, "We have to talk about it one day, we don't have forever, possibly not even another seventy years if you plan on offing yourself before thirty."

"What would you do with your life if I did off myself?" Locke asked, looking at him.

Zane raised an eyebrow at him. "Excuse me?"

"What would you do? Would your world stop?"

Zane looked at him for a moment, then slowly let go. "For a while," he muttered.

"But then?"

"I would move on," Zane said and Locke looked away, "I'd continue my career. I'd find a woman I can love, get married, have children, retire eventually and move on to working as a coach or a commentator, eventually die and that'd be that."

Locke slowly sat down on the edge of the bed.

"What if I didn't die?" he muttered.

"Well that changes things."

"How?"

"Either I'd follow the same old plan regardless and marry with children etc... or, I suppose, you'd be a major factor." He shrugged. "But who knows, how can I when I don't know if you'll be around."