Funeral

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It was about 10am and the funeral was at 11 but we had to get there at 10:30 am and Dougie wouldn't get dress. Small Doug would just not big Doug.

"Dougie just put the suit on" Danny said "fine" he sighed as he huffed off upstairs.

"So are you all going in Harry's car?" I asked as I locked the house "yeah" Danny said "okay" I said as the boys got in the car and I got in and drove off.

Skip to the service

We were stood outside and I was stood with the lads and I had Buzz and Doug close to me. "Mrs Fletcher would now like to say some words for her husband" the priest said as I walked up to the front "I really never thought I would have to speak at my husbands funeral at 36" I said "what do I even say? Tom you were the love of my life. You've been there for me since I was seven and we have been inseparable since until now. It's been two weeks since you have gone and I still wake up thinking your next to me." I said "everyone knows the end and unfortunately the end is here. I didn't know I had it until it was all gone.Buzz and Doug miss you like crazy and so do I and can't seem to get rid of the lads" I smiled "I keep referring back to Mcfly lyrics but without you I'm not a survivor" I cried and I walked back to the boys and hugged them as they were crying and then Dougie, Danny and Harry went up and spoke. "Don't worry about Lily and the boys. We are here to look after" Danny said "I know your looking down at us and shaking your head because you don't want us to miss you but how can we not miss our best friend and the person who made our lives better" Dougie said.

We stood watching them put him into the ground "have fun on the moon daddy" Buzz said as he threw a buzz light year in the ground.

We were at home in the lounge and I was cuddled up with Buzz and Doug and the guys were sat around "why did daddy have to go?" Buzz asked "why do you pick the best flowers?" I asked "best they are the best ones" he said "the best people go like the best flowers go" I said "you still haven't listened to the song wrote for you" Danny said "whee is it ?" I asked "it's on your laptop in the kitchen" he said as I went in there and saw it set up on the dinning table and I sat down looked at a video and it was paused on Tom's face and so I pressed play "Lil, I bet your wondering why the hell is my dead husband on my screen? Well my alive wife I wrote a song for you and we recorded a few years and it got to number one. I am going sing it for you right now" he laughed and then he sang All about you! And it made me cry "I know that your crying right now and your denying it and your denying that your in denial" he laughed and I paused it on his smile and laughter "oh Tom" I said and then I played it "I love you Lily. I miss you so much. I know you don't know what to do but all you need to do is believe in yourself. You and the boys are the best things that's ever happened to me. I maybe gone but I'm always here! It's not always easy but I'm here forever. I don't like referring back to my lyrics but I didn't know I had it to the moment I lost it all. I'm gonna start crying in a minute so i better go, remember that I love you with all my heart" he said and then the video carried on with him just sat there smiling with tears in his eyes and then it ended. I sat there and cried and I saw Dougie stood at the door "I miss him" I cried and he hugged me "we all miss him" he said.

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I was sat up in bed wearing Tom's yellow sleeved top and I was on my laptop watching videos of Tom and as I was watching the videos I noticed that two little boys had gotten in the bed both either side of me "can we sleep in here?" Doug asked "of course you can" I said as I hugged them both "what are you watching ?" Buzz asked "daddy's old videos" I smiled as I clicked on Buzz and the dandelions "that was toy when you were about one and daddy had blue hair" I smiled as we all laughed at Buzz's laughed. We watched videos for hours "it's way past your bedtime" I said as I put my laptop in the floor.

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