Rebel Family (one-shots)

Nightmare 3: My fault

This happens a couple days later when they return back to the base from Malachor. ENJOY!!!!!!!

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Ezra's P.O.V

I woke up once again from that horrible nightmare. Or should I say memory of my failure. Failure to save Ahsoka and blind Kanan. It was all my fault that I was useless and wasn't strong enough to protect them. One job, I had one job and it all ended horribly. Leaving Ahsoka and a scar that can never be healed for Kanan. Somehow, I make it out without a scratch.

I shouldn't have trusted Maul. It was all my fault for trusting him that did all of it. I can't even face Kanan about it, I hardly ever saw him these passed couple of days. I think he is avoiding me and to be honest, I deserve it. I deserved to be ignored, forgotten.........not trust worthy.

I jumped out of my bed after blaming myself. I went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I entered and went to get a cup. I paused when the door opened and turned to find none other than Hera. I was frozen in my spot and didn't, no couldn't move. There was the pilot that was the only one who came back for me when she didn't even know me. That convinced the others to let me stay. The one that treated me like my mother when times were tough.

"Haven't seen you since for a while since you came back to the base," she said leaning against the frame of the door. When we got back, I barely showed myself around the Ghost, thinking that I would only be shamed for what I did. For what I'm becoming......

"Yeah, well you would be hiding after what happened to us," I said hugging myself and facing Hera without looking her in the eye. If I even peeked, I promise that she could read me like a book with the first glance. "Can you tell me what happened then?" Hera asked. I should of seen that coming. "Why would you even care?!" I spat, "it was my fault, all my fault, end of story!"

Hera didn't even flinched when I yelled at her. Her expression was blank, I couldn't tell what emotion she was feeling. "How?" She said. "How what?" I said calming myself down. Hera didn't need to be yelled at, there was no reason for yelling at her. "How is it your fault?" She asked standing straight and walked towards me. "Look, it's nothing, just go to bed," I said.

Hera didn't by it and stood in front of me. "It must be something," she said. "You know what, I'm going back to bed," I said and started to walk back to my room. "Ok, goodnight Ezra," she said, "If you need me, you know where to find me." Wait, was Hera actually letting me go? I stopped heading back to bed and towards the cockpit.

Once the door slid open, I stepped in and said, "Why didn't you stop me? Aren't you going to pep talking me into saying what happened?" I asked. Hera swiveled her chair around to face me. "Is there something you want to say to me?" Hera asked raising an eyebrow and crossing her arms. I was going to say something but nothing came out of my mouth. I didn't know how to reply.

Hera patted the seat next to her and so I silently walked over and sat in the seat. Hera faced me and gestured for me that she was listening. I started to explain the painful memory form a couple of days ago and how I had my nightmare.

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I couldn't help myself 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

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   After I was done explaining, I was in tears. Hera is going to look at me differently, treat me differently and blame me for everything. What can I say except that this was all my fault. I hide my face in my hands and tried my best to make sure she doesn't see how weak I am.

   I wasn't expecting arms to wrap around me. I wasn't expecting her to whisper into my ear, telling me reassuring words. I wasn't expecting her to say next. "It wasn't your fault," she cooed, "and it's ok to cry Ezra, it's not good to hold in all these emotions, let it out." I didn't listen though and I had to admit, it was starting to hurt, I could literally feel the pain. Was that even possible? I guess it is.

   "I know you think that it is your fault but what could you have done," She said, "I'm proud of you Ezra, we all are.......even Kanan." That was the last blow, I began to let out muffled sobs into the pilot's shoulder. "That's it Ezra," Hera said and rubbed circles on my back. How could they be proud of me?! I trusted Maul, let him blind Kanan, possibly kill Kanan and I just sat on the side lines watching most of it happen.

   Somehow, Hera knew what I was thinking when she spoke again. "We are proud of you because you brought yourself and Kanan home.  Ahsoka gave herself up to save you both and bring you guys home." "B-but why?" I asked not really knowing at all. It was hard to think through my head right now and it's been bugging me. "I don't really know," Hera admitted but continued, "Maybe she remembered herself as you."

   I was confused, "What does that mean?" Hera sighed and said, "She doesn't want to lose more family because she might think it was her fault the first time and didn't want to make it the second time." I was taking this all in. I laid my head on Hera's shoulder and found it very comfy. "Let's go and get some sleep," Hera said. I yawned and rubbed my eyes, "ok." We both walked to our rooms but I was stopped by Hera.

   She lead me to her room. We both laid down and fell asleep. The last thing I said but didn't realize it, was, "Night mom." "Night Ez," but I didn't hear her cause I was already asleep.

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