Burgundy Is The New Sexy

||Chapter 18||

"K, I want to thank you for giving me a second chance at this. At us. I promise you won't regret it." Greyson said as he walked me to my front door. I nodded along with whatever he was saying. Apart of me wanted to believe him. That part of me which seeked his attention for so long. That part of me which longed for the relationship we once had. To tell the truth, I wanted to experience it again to tell if I still loved Grey like how I used to. But knowing Grey, I knew for a fact that he is going to f^¿k it up. He always does. I know, I know, why are you even giving him another chance then? Well, I wanted to give him this one chance to prove if he really means what he says. That he going to be there for me when I need a shoulder to lean on. That he will be here with me to love and to hold me, to treat me like a Queen and to be my Knight in a shinning armor. I wanted to give him another chance so that I can prove to myself that I need to move on, and that he doesn't deserve me. That I deserve better. "I love you." I nodded again.

Another part of me was trying to figure out why the hell we were still together. You know he is not going to keep his promise why waste time? Why sit and wait to prove that he is not the right one for you when you could be out searching for that one person? Why hurt yourself even more to know that even though you gave him another chance to see if he still loved you like he loved you before, or if he could love you again if he stopped, he still doesn't love you the way he did, or the way you wanted him to? Why put yourself out there like that? Naked to be scorched my him. He'd bruise you up. So bad that you think that no one could ever love you again, but luckily everyone has a fixer upper. He can clear your bruises. Literally. I nearly laughed as M came to mind.

"K?" I was shaken out of my thoughts. I looked over at Grey. He was staring at me expectantly. Oh, he said I love you. "You're not going to get that out of me Grey. You have to prove yourself first." He sighed dejectedly. "I'll see you Grey." I gave him a chast kiss on the cheek before I stepped into my house. Closing the door I leaned back against it as I let out a long sigh. God! Now that I got him where I always wanted him for all these months, I'm worried sick that it won't work out and that he will just hurt me even more. I'm worried that it doesn't go as plan. Is it wrong of me to chase after him for so many months but now that he is the one chasing after me it feels wrong? If that makes any sense. It feels like I'm doing someone wrong. Why? Who? Just stop K, you're just confusing yourself. You seriously don't know what you want.

I kicked off my heels and placed my coat in the hall closet before making my way towards the stairs. I wonder if M went home? I swear this man can be in two places at once. As I neared the living room I heard soft music playing. Smiling I tip toed to the entrance. How did he get back so fast?

"Awww." I cooed at the sight. M was sprawled out on my L-shaped couched wrapped in a thick Burgundy blanket, suffocating one of my many pillows in his strong arms. I tip toed further into the room. His hair was in a messy bun with a few strands falling out. Silently I made my way out of the room so that I could retrieve my phone to take a picture of this cuteness.

"Какого черта?"(What the hell?) He grumbled as the light flashed. He threw a few strands of his hair from out of his face as he looked up at me groggily. I stood there guilty as he playfully glared at me.

"What did you say?" He chuckled. Getting up he patted the space beside him. I sat down.

"You don't worry about that. You're just coming home huh?" I nodded. "I take it you enjoyed yourself?" You would know, you were there. But this argument was for another day.

"It was okay, I'm giving him another chance at this." I said unsure. I felt so guilty telling him this. I really didn't know why, but I felt like M was-

"You did, that's great. I hope you guys work out." He smiled. I nodded absentmindly.

We sat in an awkward silence after that. I didn't know what to say, I felt like I shouldn't have told him that. The reason, I don't know.

"Well, I was just waiting up to make sure that you made it home safely, so I'll be going." He got up. I bit my lip. I didn't want him to. I reached for his hand. He spun around confused as his eyes scanned my body. This position that we were in made me think back to this morning where I felt his tool. I licked my lips as I clenched. Oh! I thought these feelings were going to be gone once Grey started to give me attention. But instead I got the opposite. They were stronger.

"Hmmmm?" He hummed in confusion. I blushed. Oh God! Back to square one again! He chuckled.

"Stay?" I asked meekly. He smiled and nodded. We switched the lights off and made our way towards my bedroom. I went to have a bath as M sat on my bed.

Stepping out of the bathroom in a my pajamas that I had carried with me, I saw M getting up. I looked at him confused. He smiled.

"K, you're giving him another chance, wouldn't it be wrong to sleep with another guy?"

"Bu-but we aren't doing anything." I tried to persuade. He laughed and came over to me. Brushing his fingers on my cheekbone he bit his lips.

"I'll just be one room down the hall." He reasoned. Bu-but my bed will be cold. I will be cold.

"Bu-but-"

"K, no." He said hughing me to him. We stayed like this for a few minutes before he let go of me and went over towards the door. Giving me one last look he winked then walked out. Leaving me bare and alone. Why do I feel like I'm safe and secure when I'm around M, but when I'm not I feel bare to the world? God he is driving me crazy.

I climbed into my bed and laid awake thinking about everything. I'm just so confused. I don't know what I want. Who I want? Shut up you!

I fell into a fitful sleep eventually, but I was in content as soon as two familiar muscular arms encircled my body and pulled me close.