What If

Crossroard

* own nothing all belongs to Dick Wolf!*

What if life as I knew it wasnt true. Everything I lived for was completely wrong and my family was lying to me my whole life. The question of what if is a way of losing hope but also having hope. Its like a fork in the road you can either chose the evil path or the good path. What if I didnt chose or what if I started to go down one path but turned around to the other path. What would happen to others around. Well what if I wasnt sure what was happening in the world around me like I thought it was. In a life time one person can ask the question what if over a million times.

In my life, everything was dark all time. The sky looked as if it was permanently colored in grey with a childs marker. The dogs were barking all the time but it wasnt a play bark. No, it was more of the I want to kill you bark. My town didnt really get along. Teenagers were always getting arrested and adults. Well Ill leave it at that. I didnt know what was worse being at home with my 11 foster siblings or roaming the streets and hearing sirens screaming from every direction. We lived in the bay area, so we had many fishing boats around. I hate fish, the smell of them can make me want throw up and when the fishing men are cutting them up it looks like they are still barely alive staring you down with its eyes that never close. If you think about it us humans are like fish just living until one day your life suddenly ends and you cant stop it. My so called family doesnt really pay attention to me. I dont question it. Until that one day.

It was normal glumly day when it started at least. Now dear reader let me remind you the sun never shines here not even through the clouds. When I walked out of the school doors something was different. The sun was shining so bright I thought we would all burn at that very moment. I was on edge while walking home. What if this is heaven. What if the world was ending. No, that wouldnt happen because more people would be freaking out. As I get closer to my house I see a new car and I know it wasnt Tracy because we werent due for a house check. I walk in with more caution than usual. I see an old man sitting on the couch and my foster parents crying. I slowly creep my way in and Lauren, my foster mother, leaps up and hugs me. Ok now I know the world is ending they never hugged us or even give us a simple birthday card. Maybe the old, bald man is a cop, thats the only reason they would act like this.

They set me in a chair and in a sympathetic voice, they whimpered that Im leaving with this man, who is not only a caption of a detective unit but he claims to be my grandfather. This is the moment when I was shoved off the evil path on to the good path. Not only did I hit a crossroad but I was only aloud one direction whether I liked it or not. My life froze. The looks of Lauren and Branden frozen in time. While the old man had a look of worry or maybe the look of caution like something bad was going to happen at any moment. Life turned into a slow-motion video like the ones you watch on YouTube, the video starts normal speed then all the sudden it moves just barely. I now know why I never really felt relaxed like a person would when they come home. The people who raised me since I was 2 years old were not the people I thought they were. In slow motion, the captain stood slowly and raised his gun at them and 4 more cops came in. I was still on the couch not knowing how to react because living in this town you dont really flinch when cops are arresting someone but when its your foster parents you dont know how to react. When Branden reached to grab a gun a lady detective yanked me behind her. When I heard a gunshot and saw Branden scream in pain while clutching his shoulder. I finally let out a tiny confused what?

After they were taken into custody, 2 detectives walked over to the cop car I was standing by. There was something about them that I remembered but I couldnt place it. The lady was the first to talk to me since everything happened. I only heard her name Liv but I wasnt really listening to her. Then hit me so I blurt out the room. They look at me with concern. I grab the Livs hand and pushed through all the people that were working. I go into the house to a wall with a picture of Lauren and I when I was little. I take the picture off and set it on the ground not really worrying if I was ruining it or not. Liv looks at me and her partner. My nerves on high alert I whisper push it.

The little pressure it takes the secret white door that once held my picture slowly creaks open with suspense and mystery. I hold my breath because once when I was home alone I tripped and fell on the wall and the door cracked open. What I discovered was a nightmare so I blocked it out of my memory. What if I never discovered the room that held my life in and then I wouldnt know about the people or what was happening. I always thought I wasnt lucky enough for that to happen.