The return

Nice to see you

"Izzie?" Meredith couldn't believe her eyes. Izzie Stevens, standing in front of her. After eight years, after an entire eternity, she is here again. She didn't know how to react. She didn't know how to feel. Should she be happy to see an old friend or mad because she left?

"What are you doing here Izzie?" she chose anger. That's the only thing she had left, after everything.

Izzie wanted to hug her. She wanted to hug her so bad. It's her. It's Meredith Grey. The same girl with whom she spent the best years of her life. The girl she lived with, laughed and cried with. The same girl she saw for the last time when she was packing her bags, after everything Alex has said to her. The girl she begged to stay with them, with her and her family. It's her! But is she still the same? Izzie wiped her tears but couldn't speak. As if she froze.

"Izzie what are you doing here?"

Meredith repeated the question. Not even in her wildest dreams she thought she would see Izzie Stevens again. She didn't hear anything about her in years. She didn't get a single text, no sign that she was alive. She was angry, but she was happy too. Izzie is alive, Izzie is back.

"Hey Mer. It's good to see you."

She tried to smile as sincere as she could, but she couldn't. She had no idea what Meredith thought of her but she could tell it was nothing good.

"Nice to see me?! That's all you have to say to me? After eight years? Really Izzie? What are you doing here?"

"I.. I came to see Derek, but... they just told me he..."

"Derek is dead Izzie."

"I'm so sorry Mer.. I'm so sorry, I ... I didn't know..."

"Your "sorry" doesn't mean anything Izzie. You didn't know? Well even if you did would it change anything? Would you give me a call? Just like you called when Lexie died? My sister is dead Izzie, and you didn't even call me!"
She felt betrayed. She could feel her heart beating faster, and her blood boiling.

"Mer I'm so sorry... I am... I..." she wanted to say so much, but words weren't coming out.

"It doesn't matter, really. Things changed, things aren't as they used to be. Tell me what brought you here. Why did you need Derek?"

Izzie didn't know how to answer that, things changed so much. Nothing was enough, what ever she did, what ever she said won't make up for the past eight years. She was sure that for Meredith those eight years felt like a lifetime, but for her... she felt like she got fired yesterday, like she left here yesterday.

"I wouldn't agree that everything changed."

"What do you mean Izzie?"

She didn't want to burden her. Derek is dead and she doesn't have a reason to be here. This was a mistake. A mistake from the beginning. She is going to go and let Meredith go back to her life. As if she never came back.

"Izzie, what do you mean?"

Meredith wasn't giving up, she wanted to know why she came back, but Izzie wasn't answering. As if she drifted into different space and time.

"Izzie did you come back because of Alex? If you did I..."

"No! I'm not here because of him!" She didn't let her finish.

"Mer I'm here because..."

She couldn't finish her sentence because she collapsed. She just fell. Her body gave up. Just like everyone else, she let herself down. She didn't have the strength or the will to fight. She is not going to be missed. No one will notice she is gone. She just wanted to see George. All these years she wanted to see him. And when the tumor came back she hoped he would come, but he didn't-it was Denny again.

"Izzie!! Izzie, can you hear me? Page Dr Shepherd!!" everyone gathered around them.

"Hey, you're not going to die! You just came back, come on Izzie, you can do this! Come on Izzie, please, don't do this! Today is the anniversary of Derek's death! Please don't! I can't lose you again, I just got you back. Come on Iz, come on!"

Her tears were falling on Izzie's face, and she was pressing her hearth with her hands. What the hell happened?