Losing Love

Chapter 8

Things happened like a blur for Dara after that fateful day. She remembered Yang Hyun Suk comforting her in the practice room. She was wailing like a baby when he came in. She never cried like this before even when she got the news that her father left them.

Yang Hyun Suk sat down beside her and gently patted her back. For the first few minutes he just sat there and allowed her to cry. After all her tears were spent he gently but firmly told her to go home and rest. To not think about her problem for one day so she could go back the next day with somewhat renewed spirits.

"Rest for today. Then tomorrow you come back here. We'll make plans on what to do with your career. Grab the chance to reinvent yourself. To become the woman who is deserving of her man. You can't be a snivelling wreck if you want to be that woman for him."

She looked up at Sajangnim's words. "You love him, right?" She sniffed and nodded. "He loves you, right?" Her eyes started to well up again but she bit her lip. "I would like to believe he still loves me." She whispered sadly.

"Then man up. Or should I say woman up. If it's really love between the two of you, no matter how many times you think you've lost it, love will always find it's way back. And even if it doesn't, cause realistically speaking not everyone gets their fairytale ending, you still won't be shortchanging yourself if you come out of this experience a stronger woman."

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The period after their breakup tested Dara's acting abilities to the maximum. No one who saw her, except those who wete really close to her, would have guessed that she was a mess inside. She acted as if she was doing fine but inside she was broken almost beyond despair.

The first few days she ran purely on autopilot. She took it one step at a time until quite surprisingly she found herself going at the pace of an energizer bunny. She immersed herself in work, work and more work. Anything that could help distract her from going on her default-I'm-depressed-without-Jiyong mode, she welcomed with open arms.

Some days she gets by okay but some days were just far worse than others. Just when she would think she's almost fine she'd catch a whiff of a familiar fragrance or hear snatches of his songs and she would almost break down once again.

During these moments, it became extremely hard for her to stem her longing for him. She was a bundle of nerves and contradicting wants. She wanted to see him but at the same time she wanted to hide from him.

The first few days following their breakup brought out the closet stalker in her. She'd be overcome by intense longing for him that she'd drive by his street a couple of times just to catch a glimpse of him. She wanted just a glimpse. She didn't want him to see her. She felt she'd be safer inside her car feeling that from that distance somehow she'd be insulated from the sharp sting of their separation.

It was another story when she has to go to YG's building. Those times, she would be a nervous wreck. Scared that she might run in to him and break down. It even came to the point that she was tempted to ask Jiyong's manager his schedule so that she would be sure that they won't be in the same building at the same time.

It was even more difficult because in her line of work it was unavoidable that she'd be asked about Jiyong. Her social media accounts were also peppered with numerous comments, questions and speculations about them. She really couldn't escape him. People would mention him in variety shows and radio talks.

A few weeks after the incident and it was still the norm for her to be asked by people about it. She guested on Talking Street and she was asked directly regarding the incident. Even though she was expecting it, it was still a challenge for her to mask her feelings.