Never Ending Surprises (Marauders era love story)

I Wonder

~Seri~

"So, Miss Hennessy" Dumbledore paced in front of his desk, up and down, up and down. It made me nervous, watching him decide what to say. "How are you?"

I'd forgotten there was such thing as formalities.

"Good, I guess, as good as one can be with people dying and exams and all" I tried to smile but he looked at me in such a concerned manner that I presumed it had looked more like I was about to cry. Probably correct.

"Of course, a difficult question to ask at the moment" He sat down, finally, and moved everything to the side with a flick of his hand. "Let's talk about something else shall we?"

"Sure"

"How have you gone about transforming after your last episode" My shock of him knowing about my ability to turn into a very mobile, very ginger cat was subdued by the memory of what had happened next. 

"I guess I haven't really tried, after the whole... fainting thing" I mumbled into my lap, picking at a rogue fingernail on my thumb. 

"Why not?" He cocked his head to one side as if he could possibly be curious for an answer.

"Why do you think?" I was getting frustrated now, "Why am I here Dumble-- Professor?". He raised an eyebrow but ignored my outburst.

"I had thought that would be obvious, after last weeks incident". 

Ahh, of course. How could I think I would escape, uninterrogated from the previous weeks' occurrence. Something I should have remembered, but I guess it was never something I considered a factor necessary for remembering. What a fucking idiot.

"Right, right... sorry" I put my head down again as if trying to repent for a sin. I suppose you could say it wasn't really my fault, but having any kind of knowledge about events kind of puts you in the blame doesn't it? That's what, it seemed, my friends thought anyhow and unfortunately, theirs was the opinion that mattered. To me at least. I wished now, however, that I had thought to put Dumbledore on the list of people to be worried about. 

"Why don't you tell me what happened?"

"Well you know, the screaming and the fun times" I mumbled, avoiding eye contact. I stared instead at Fawkes pecking softly at his feathers. It would be pretty cool to see him light up. Perhaps I'll be stuck in here long enough to watch it.

"I want your perspective, Miss Hennessy" He smiled patiently and leaned back into his chair. He was in for the long haul. I paused, wondering where to start, or how to start. 

"I guess, I was just sick of feeling like I needed to know everything, all the time, in all possible moments-- you know?" I tapped my fingers loudly on the arm of the chair. It already had small scratches on the side of it. I wonder who was here before me?

"You wanted to do something"

"Yeah, yeah I guess so. I just, well I know names, of people. Well, I don't know if you could call them people but students who..." I bit my lip, would he take me seriously? Who sympathizes with Voldemort"

"Yes, I am aware of students whose families have ties to the dark arts," He said calmly. It was frustrating, watching him sit there on his grand wooden chair staring down at me with not an inkling of differing emotion. Feel something.

"No no, but not just ties. Death eaters-- actual Death eaters are or were roaming our halls, they are here..." He continued to stare, patiently. It made me feel stupid like I was a small child trying to justify fairytales. He waited, perhaps making sure I'd finished.