life Is Now

London, March 2017

Friday night we take a Norwegian flight to Gatwick, and the express train to Victoria, then tube to Vauxhall, where Chris found a decent hotel for a good price. We eat in a nearby pub and feel very English indeed. The white hotel sheets remind us of Bergen. It's a funny feeling. I was so totally in love, I can see it now.

In the morning, we head back to Victoria, where we meet William and his friend Jen. William gives me a long hug, but he's clearly also uncertain of what I'm thinking of him. The boys need to talk, that's why we are here. And Jen is here to take me to see the sights, or whatever.

Jen is really nice, chatty girl, we hit of right away. She's a couple of years older psychology student, studying at the same school where William takes economics. She's born and raised in London, and finds tons of fun stuff for us to do. Nothing with long ques of tourist involved. We go to a Sainsbury store, buy everything British and head for picnicking in a park.

- So, how do you know William? I have to ask.

- We met at the school parties. Welcoming the new students, I guess. I'm really interested in Scandinavia, and I heard him talking Norwegian with his girlfriend, so I started talking with them.

- Oh, so you met Noora?

- Yes, in the autumn she always came to the university gatherings with him. Until she left. So you know this – Norah?

- Noora is my best friend.

I get a feeling, that there's something Jen would like to ask, but chooses not to.

- So that's how you know William? Through Norah?

- We used to party together in high school. I mean before he and Chris graduated. And then William got together with Noora, and I got, well involved, with Chris.

- William and Chris?

- Best friends since forever. Like brothers, they raised each other, I guess. William's family had some serious issues. He never told you about Chris?

- William doesn't do – well talking. Not with me. He calls me when he wants to have fun.

- Fun?

- Yeah. Well, he's very serious about his studies, and he works a lot for his dad. Seems like he haven't got many friends here. We go to parties. Or clubbing. Or just play station and take out food. That sort of thing. Anything we fancy, really.

- Don't you have friends, then?

- Me, I have a lot of friends. I study psychology, so I also have to live, not only read books. I just like spending time with William. It's interesting to see how a Viking thinks.

This sound a bit weird, but it's clear that Jen is not going to give any full report on William's post Noora life in London. And I want to enjoy this beautiful day.

After some hours, William calls Jen. He want's us to crab some curries, and come to he's place. He and Chris are obviously done enough talking.

William's dad has bought him this nice flat at Canonbury. A good investment is what William calls it. The boys are doing sings star when we come. We have a fun night, a good laugh. William is more at ease now, but keeps the conversation very superficial. I start to understand what Jen meant.

When me and Chris are leaving, I have to go back to get my mobile charger. William has a guilty look on his face when he opens the door. He wipes his lips with his palm, and then I see the traces of Jen's lipstick. I get my charger, and keep quiet all the way to the hotel. There I have to ask Chris.

- What's going on with William and Jen?!

- They are just friends?

- But they are sleeping together? I think I interrupted them, when I went back.

- Yes, they are sleeping together. Friends with benefits, remember babe?

- Are they really friends? Or like we were?

- Who knows? I kind of think they really are just friends. William is still shutting down all of his feelings, and Jen seems just to want something easy and non-messy so that she can concentrate on the other aspects of her life. Which are many. They don't meet that much, that's at least what William says.

I must admit, that there were no romantic vibe at all. William and Jen were just really comfy around each other. Jen knowing William's place in and out.

- And you have known this for a long time?

- Yes, sometime. I couldn't tell you, since you have to tell Noora.

- I still have to tell Noora! Don't you think she should know? She's fucking waiting for William!

- She probably should know. The thing is, William has not stopped loving Noora. He thinks Noora left him.

- Noora thinks they are together, having a pause, since London didn't work!

- I've tried to tell that to William, but he just can't see it. I also think Jen is the best thing that could happen to William right now.

- That's a horrible thing to say! Noora and William were so good together!

- It breaks my heart too. But William can relax with Jen, have a laugh. He's really alone here. Oh, so grown up. So serious. He needs to take some steam out sometimes. In high school, we had The Penetrators to do our crazy shit with. We had the cabins, and the boats, and the secret swimming places.

- William needs to sleep with her?!

- I actually think he does. He needs to be close to somebody, if only for sex. I would be really happy, if William fall in love, because then he had started to open up. And he might even go back to Noora. If William were just picking a new girl every Friday night, there would be messy expectations, hurt feelings, questions. He can't take that. With Jen he has a clear agreement.

- So, I tell Noora not to worry, because he doesn't have any feelings at all?

- You tell Noora, what you have to. But please also tell her, that William still loves her.

- She won't believe that.

- Tell her anyway.