He's my life, my love, my soul, my home

Chapter 1

Noise. That was good. That was a blessing. Noise, to block out all the static, and screams, and cries, and gunshots, and screams, and screams and screams. The scream that forever haunts him. Oh God, Bucky's fearful scream and, and-

HONK!

Noise. Yes, Steve thinks, noise is good, noise is great, noise is a blessing. And what a better place to get all your thoughts drowned out than standing in one of the busiest places in the country, New York. Deep breaths, Rogers. In out. In out. Sometimes noise was bad. Sometimes busy cities like Manhattan was a curse. Like when all his new surroundings overwhelm him and nothing is familiar anymore. Deep breaths. In out. In out.

It was only a few weeks after the battle of New York and Steve found himself standing in front of Stark --Avengers-- tower. Stark had invited all the Avengers, saying something about 'if the team was together than we could get to the mission faster', which had Romanov snorting. Stark and Banner were already in the lobby, which seemed nice since it looked like they were trying to greet people. Banner smiled and held up his hand in a wave and Stark came towards Steve with a big obnoxious smile on his face.

"Well, if it isn't the Star Spangled Man with a Plan himself, how'ya doing Cap," Stark said in greeting. His smile never wavered and he punched Steve (who bodily flinched away from him) in the arm, before turning around.

"Umm... Fine I guess. I mean things could be better, and umm yeah," Steve answered awkwardly and he started rubbing his neck. His awkwardness and anxiety had never left after he got the serum. He stilled tensed up around people he didn't know and attempted to curl up on himself if they got to close. Only Bucky seemed to notice and only Bucky seemed to get him to speak. But, Bucky wasn't here. No one could bring him out of his head. No one could help with his anxiety. No one would ever see him, and that was all his fault because, because-

"Great. Your quarters is the 82nd floor. Jarvis will show you around and help you with anything that you might need, " Stark continued, blessedly unaware of Steve's current predicament. "My suite is the 90th floor, don't try and come up, but it's locked by Jarvis anyway so don't worry. Brucie-bear's suite is on the 89th floor, I'm sure the good doctor would welcome you with open arms. The common floor is the 85th floor and Legolas' floor is the 83rd and the Spider Queen's is the 86th. Oh and..." Stark continued to ramble as Steve took in the new and unsurprisingly overwhelming information.

Tuning him out Steve turned to Dr.Banner, who was currently looking at something intently on his tablet. He sighed and stepped into the elevator with Stark and let him control the still confusing but not an unfamiliar thing. 'Deep breaths, deep breaths,' he reminded himself. 'Now is not the time for a panic attack, Rogers.' A few minutes later the elevator stopped and Stark stepped out and into a large open living room space that had big picture windows that lead to a balcony, a large dining room straight ahead, a kitchen that looked to be the size of two of Steve's old apartment, and a hallway that had at least 4 doors. Overall, the whole place was massive and impressive.

"So, whaddya think," Stark asked in his usual uncaring, arrogant tone. He smiled again, but this time it was smug, like he just one something or that the chance to impress Captain America was so big it made his head even bigger. Steve smiled kindly and he hoped, it looked grateful as well. He wanted to say, 'this is great thanks', he wanted to say, 'how can I ever repay you for giving me this', he wanted to, oddly enough, hug Stark for his generosity. But all he did was shrug and say "s'cool."

Stark's smile faltered and his uncaring eyes turned cold for a brief second before having his usual facade back up. "Al'right. See'ya Cap. Oh and by the way the spy twins should be around sometime tonight." He turned to leave and before he got to the elevator where Dr.Banner was still waiting, engrossed in his tablet, Steve grabbed Stark's elbow.