The Misfortunes of Lolita

05 | when lolita hid

THIS IS AN UNEDITED AND SIGNIFICANTLY DIFFERENT VERSION OF THE MISFORTUNES OF LOLITA. I AM PUBLISHING IT IN FALL 2021—PLEASE FOLLOW ME ON IG @/ls.akhter and GOODREADS (L AKHTER) TO STAY UPDATED. I am so excited to share TMoL with you again.

CHAPTER 5

"I do not see pity in his eyes. I see anger and sadness and a hurricane of gold and green that I am starting to crave."

-Lolita's writing journal

When the light of day disappeared from the school windows, Frank closed his eyes.

He could just imagine his mother, wondering where he was. She wouldn't look for him, just yet. She would probably think he was outside, hanging out somewhere. She wouldn't start worrying, not even when it would be ten at night. Instead, she would just think that he was exactly like his father. She would be disappointed.

And that was worse.

It had gotten colder inside, and Lolita sat, huddled in his arms. He had asked her a hundred times now, if she was okay, and she had just nodded.

Lolita, are you okay?

Nod.

Lolita, you're shaking.

Nod.

Lolita, you're crying.

Nod.

She couldn't have been okay. Of course she wasn't. If Frank felt like his lungs were on fire because of how angry he felt, he couldn't even imagine what Lolita must be feeling.

"We should find a way out." Frank muttered. It was a natural instinct to speak softly; it was hard to be loud in the dark. It would feel like he was violating some rule if he was loud.

"There's no way out." Lolita said, and paused, moving her mouth away from his neck. He let out a breath. So she'd noticed. He wasn't sure if he was relieved or sad that she'd noticed. "The last time I was here, I ran around the entire school like a fucking mental patient. There's no way out."

Frank swallowed, trying to be calm. Lolita needed him to be calm. "Why were you here last time?"

"When I started to like Troy," Lolita started. "Do you know him? Troy Xang?"

"Yeah." Frank knew him. He knew him.

Other than being an idiot, Troy was also a linebacker in the football team, and they said that Lolita was in love with him. When Talia found out that Lolita was in love with him, she fell in love with him too. And now they were together.

Troy himself had told Frank to join the team, when he'd first met him.

Frank had said no, right away. It was mainly because he didn't give a shit about the football team. Partly because he didn't like the guy.

"When I made the mistake of telling Talia about it," Lolita said. "This was before her overdose. Yeah, she told Lana."

"Why does Lana hate you?" Frank said.

"Why don't you?" Lolita avoided the question.

Frank didn't really have an answer. He couldn't really say. What was there to say?

Because you know the world in a way others don't.

Because you walk like you're Atlas, carrying the sky on your shoulders.

Because you have eyes the colour of black coffee and I've always hated the taste of it, but now I want to drown in it.

"Don't avoid the question." Frank said.