Chapter 69 -Helpful-

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"You what?" Pippa and Lin screamed at the same time. Well I had their attention now, each cast member sat up and stared at me their eyes burning with questions. Daveed then walked on stage, a large coffee in his hand. He paused glancing at me then back to the cast several times. "Did I walk in on something?" He asked confused.

"Yes," Anthony told him waving him over. "Now sit your ass down because I wanna hear this." I sighed, there really was no running from this.

"Okay so Theodosia just kissed you out of-" Lin started but was quickly cut off by Daveed. "You kissed Theodosia?!!" He exclaimed in shock.

"Technically she kissed me- and I uh- might've kissed her back- I- I don't know," I stuttered out.

"Awwww!" Pippa chorused with everyone else. "I-" I tried to start again but kept getting cut off by people screaming things like, "I ship it! They'd be so cute!" And eventually, I snapped, "would you guys stop awwwing!"

Everyone stopped. I felt a little guilty.

"My best friend just kissed me- she told me she loved me. I had no idea. No idea," I mumbled trying to thing of anything else to say. "I don't- I don't even know if I like girls!" I finally admitted embarrassed. "I- I just it's never crossed my mind because well because girls I just wasn't allowed too."

"What did you say?" Lin asked calmingly.

"Well when she kissed me she sorted confessed her feelings and well," I glanced down at the ground my cheeks flaming, "well I ran out of school."

"You ran out-" Lin started off by yelling, Renee shot him a quick glare. "Sorry sorry you- you ran out?" He asked quieter.

"I didn't know what to do!" I exclaimed, "she had this helpless look in her eyes I couldn't- I couldn't just. I don't know okay! This is frustrating and I don't even know God can someone shut me up?!" I muttered covering my eyes shaking my head.

"If it makes you feel better everyone knew I was gay before I came out. So when I finally decided to come out the only answer I got was 'yeah I know Rory. That's like saying the sky is blue.'" Rory admitted sighing. That made me smile a little bit.

"The first time I tried to french kiss a girl she pulled back and screamed 'ewwww what are you doing!'" Daveed told me nodding. Okay they were definitely trying to make me feel better.

"The first guy I ever kissed said another girls name after," Renee sighed nodding.

"The first time I ever heard other people, you know, I was in the same room," Pippa smirked at me and I choked back a laugh only to receive a glare from Jasmine.

"I don't know what to do," I sighed putting my head in my hands. "How do you know if you're not straight? There must be a buzzfeed quiz for this!"

"Tell me you're not going to take a buzzfeed quiz," Oak insisted.

"You don't just take a quiz, you just know," Rory shrugged. "Tell her you need time, ooh invite her over and we can talk about feelings!" He exclaimed.

"Uh some of us have jobs," Daveed rolled his eyes sounding serious.

"Daveed. It's 10 a.m. We have the same job. It's in 3 hours," Leslie remarked.

"Oh yeah," Daveed laughed.

"Lord help us all," Anthony groaned.

"Just call her, bring her to the theater and talk alright?" Lin finally spoke. I nodded, and the waiting began.

***

When she came up to the roof I don't know what I was expecting. I had been trying to prepare a speech but the moment I saw her I knew it was no use. Why was this so confusing?

Why couldn't I tell?

"Hey," Theodosia whispered.

"Hey," I responded.

The silence was deafening. It drowned out the bustling city below, all I could see was her.

"I'm sorry," we both chorused at the same time.

"Why are you sorry?" I asked confused.

"Wait why are you sorry?" She asked sharing the same confused voice as me.

"I'm sorry because I ran out and didn't give you anything." I told her.

"Well I was sorry because what I did must've been a surprise to you- but it's been killing me for weeks. I- I just couldn't hide it anymore."

"I didn't even know you were gay," I mumbled embarrassed, what a great friend I was.

"No one did. No one does. My parents would kill me if they found out. Actually they would probably kick me out of the damn house," she grumbled shaking her head.

We were avoiding it- we both knew it.

"I don't know what I'm feeling Theodosia," I finally answered. "But I know I feel something."

A/N: im so close to being done with school I can taste it

Soppy A/N 

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I started this story with nothing. Nothing but an obsession for a musical and now here I am almost to 40,000 reads. Girls like me don't get 40,000 reads. But look. Here I am. I want all of you to know, write a wattpad book. Stop saying your ideas are stupid. Do it. I can't even read the first few chapters of this book with out cringing trust me, your ideas are wonderful. I know you can do it. So what if you don't make it big? If one person read my book and liked it, that's all that matters to me. 

Your ideas are important and valid just like you. I don't know much about your life or what you go through but I know you're stronger than you think. And here I am with almost 2,000 favorites and 40,000 reads. 

Anything is possible my readers. 

Anything.

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